Warp Tour/Transcript

[Open Int. Flower Meadow]

Pearl: I can't believe that went so well!

Amethyst: That was kinda great when you hit it with your spear and it went like bing bong! *makes explosion sounds*

Pearl: *blushes* And the way you were circling around it, almost looked like strategy.

Amethyst: *laughs and blushes* Well, you know, I can do that stuff, too.

(Garnet is shown bubbling and ejecting a gemstone, Steven comes out of the meadow with a runny nose and eyes.)

Steven: Wait up! *out of breath* Sorry I couldn't help much, I think the flowers are making me *sneezes on Garnet's hip* Sorry Garnet.

Garnet: I'll live.

Pearl: Oh, Steven, you're supposed to sneeze into your antecubital fossa.

Steven: My what?

Pearl: Your... this thing. *points to elbow*

(Steven looks at his elbow as they warp out)

Steven: *gasping* Ah-ahh!

Amethyst: Do it at Pearl! *points at Pearl*

Pearl: Steven, your fossa!

Steven: Ah-CHOO! *Steven is propelled forward and his head sticks out of the warp stream*

Pearl: Oh!

Steven: Waah! Wha? *breathing heavily* Whoa.

(Steven floats partially out of the warp stream, and sees electricity crackle. He then sees a small object warping.)

Steven: Huh? Waah!

Pearl: Careful! It's dangerous to stick your head out of the stream!

Garnet: There's not much air, and it's very cold. *flicks frozen snot off Steven's nostrils*

Steven: You guys, I saw something out there!

Pearl: What?

Steven: Something warping!

Pearl: Steven, that's not possible. Is your vision blurry from the pollen?

Steven: I can see perfectly, *squints* Pearl. I know there's something out there!

Garnet: There's nothing out there, Steven. There hasn't been anything else for a long, long time.

Steven: *laying in his bed staring at the ceiling, sighs* Ugh! Uh *looks at warp pad* (Refrigerator door opens.)

Steven: Aaah! Amethyst!

Amethyst: *munching* Hey, Steven! Want some macaroni cheese? (munching continues)

Steven: *sighs* *refrigerator door closes* W-wait! I can't sleep.

Amethyst: Why? Are you scared of that thing you saw warping right into the house and attacking you in your sleep?

Steven: ..No..

Amethyst: Oh, good! Good. Nighty night! Don't let the warp monster bite! *sticks tongue out, fart noise* *chuckles* *muffled laughing as the door closes*

Steven: *sighs* Looks like I'm not sleeping tonight. *reloads water gun*

[Time skip to morning the next day]

(bird screeching)

Pearl: Steven *poking Steven* - we've got a surprise for you.

Steven: Aah! Aghh! *sprays Pearl*

Pearl: Gah! *falls on floor*

Steven: Oh, Pearl.

Garnet: Now you're not getting any cookies.

Amethyst: Cookies?! I'll take 'em!

Garnet:  *whistles*

Amethyst: *grabs tray of cookies and munches them*

Garnet: Slow down, Amethyst.

Steven: I'm sorry, Pearl. I just I guess I didn't...

Garnet: Didn't sleep. *has finger on chin as if thinking*

Steven: *yawns* Maybe.

Pearl: Oh, Steven! *wipes eye* This isn't about the thing you think you saw outside the warp stream yesterday, is it?

Amethyst: *throws tray, making a clang sound*

(All gasp)

Steven: But it was real! Something was warping somewhere in the warp!

Pearl: *puts both hands on Steven's cheek* Listen. Nothing on Earth can use the warps but us. Do you understand? Steven, nod in agreement if you understand. - Nod in agreement

Garnet: I'm confident Pearl is right. *both look at Garnet* But if it'll make you feel better, we can just go check.

(Steven removes Pearl's hands off of his cheeks and nods gently)

(Steven warps the gems back to the meadow)

Garnet: Nothing unusual.

Steven: Ah-ahh - Ahh-choo!

Garnet: Bless you.

(Steven warps the gems to the geode)

Pearl: Nothing here, either. And the geode is holding nicely.

(Steven warps the gems to the Sky Spire)

Amethyst: Whoa! Now that's something! Heh. Steven Jr.'s been busy. *laughs* This makes you a grandpa!

Garnet: *rubs Steven's head gently* Congratulations.

Steven: Hey! We're getting off task here!

Pearl: We've looked all over! There's nothing out here to find!

Steven: *mumbles and rolls eyes* But you're wrong.

Pearl: Excuse me?

Steven: *looks at Pearl* I-I mean.

Pearl: Nothing on Earth can use these warps but us! *folds arms*

Steven: Well, what if it came from space?

Pearl: *points finger upward* I, don't appreciate your tone.

(Steven warps the gems to the Galaxy Warp)

Pearl: *walks towards to the homeworld warp* These are the warps that once connected us to other planets. If something tried to come from space, it would be through here. But wait! This warp pad is broken, marked inactive by the very depressed cartoon breakfast sticker, you placed here yourself!

Amethyst: *walks up to Steven* Look, Pearl's right, like usual. Ugh! You get used to it.

Garnet: *places hand on Steven's head, Steven removes Garnet's hand off his head* We're safe.

Steven: *looks at homeworld warp* Well, I guess so.

(Steven places his hand beside the Crying Breakfast Friends sticker)

(All sigh in relief)

Amethyst: Oh, man! Finally! That took all day.

Garnet: It was important to make Steven feel secure.

Pearl: *folds arms* Yes, Steven feels much better now.

(Steven starts to get a bit angry. He gets up and faces the gems)

Steven: I'm a little tired of you guys telling me how I feel! I know I saw something outside the stream!

Pearl: And I know you didn't! *points finger*

(Steven gets upset)

(Pearl and Steven argue)

(Pearl: You don't tell me - what I already know! - Steven: Why is it so hard to just "listen to Steven"?)

(Amethyst and Garnet both look at each other)

(Amethyst and Garnet look at Steven and Pearl)

Amethyst: Uh, this is new. I kind of like it.

Pearl: *folds arms* Steven, you just don't know what you're talking about.

Steven: It sounds like maybe you *gets upset* don't know what I'm talking about!

Pearl: Ugh!

(Garnet cuts between Steven and Pearl)

Garnet: Okay, Steven, that's enough. Let it go.

(Amethyst's door opens, Amethyst walks in and see's Steven sitting in front of the warp pad)

Amethyst: Hey, dude.

(Steven looks up at Amethyst and ignores her)

Amethyst: *walks up to Steven* You still on about that thing in the stream?

(Steven shrugs)

Amethyst: Uh, what you eating? *points at a bowl of macaroni*

Steven: Macaroni and nothing. *eats macaroni*

Amethyst: Ugh. Whatever. *starts walking towards door* We can hang out again when you stop being such a sad sack. *closes door*

Steven: Ugh! Why am I doing this? Fine. I give up! Steven was wrong and everyone else was right! Nothing's going to come through that warp pad! (high-pitched whine)

Steven: *gasps* *laughing* You were the thing in the warp stream! You did come from space. *gasps* You're trying to get to the warp pad, aren't ya? Amethyst, come back! Oof! I knew it! I did see something! Guys! I was right! Waah! Guys! Come on! Check this out! Ow! Unh! Aah! Sorry! Huh?

Steven: Oh, no, you don't! Garnet! Amethyst! Pe-e-e-arl! (warps activates) Where are you going?! Huh? Y-you're coming from all over? Ow! Hey! Stop it! Whoa! (The Flask Robonoid pushes him half out of the warp stream)

Steven: Unh! Huh? *grunting* I won't let you Unh! *panting* *shuddered breathing *sighs* I was right. *chuckles weakly* And now I'm gonna die a tired, frozen little sad sack. (warp stream activates) *looks at warp stream* Huh?

(Garnet grabs Steven as he floats, Steven takes deep breaths while holding on to Garnet)

Garnet: Take deep breaths. So, this is what you saw.

Steven: *cries a little* I don't care about that!

Garnet: I do. *wipes off tear* I should've listened to you. You're a Crystal Gem, too.

(Steven stares at Garnet and smiles)

Pearl: Steven, are you okay?! Amethyst heard the warp pad activating, and Garnet said you were floating outside the stream and *looks at the Flask Robonoid* Uh! What is that?

Steven: You don't know?

Amethyst: *pushes Pearl out of the way* Whoa. That thing's far out.

Steven: It's some kind of space robot. There were tons of them! And it looked like they were all going to the same place.

(Steven and Gems are back at the Galaxy Warp, the robonoid drops on the ground and walks up towards the homeworld warp)

(All robonoids are fixing the homeworld warp, the gems run towards the warp)

Pearl: What are they doing to the homeworld warp?

Amethyst: *looks at Garnet* There's a million of them! *looks back at repaired warp* They fixed it?

Steven: *looks at Amethyst* What does that mean?

(Pearl cuts between Garnet and Amethyst)

Pearl: *gasps* I... don't know.

(the warp stream activates) *all gasp*

(Garnet grabs the gems and hides behind a tall rock)

Garnet: *grunts* Huah!

(Unidentified gem gently stomps on the homeworld warp)

Unidentified gem: Hmm.

Pearl: *whispering* Who is that?

Garnet: *whispering* No idea.

Peridot: Log date: 312. This is Peridot, performing Earth hub maintenance check. (a robonoid crawls up her shoulder)

Steven: Peridot. Her name is Peridot. *Pearl and Amethyst cover his mouth* *muffled speaking*

Peridot: Warp repair a success. All 79 flask robonoids deployed and accounted for. Preparing to locate and manually reactivate kindergar- *gasps*

(The damaged robonoid lays down and rolls back and forth)

Steven: Aww. The little ones are like her babies.

(Peridot puts her foot on the robonoid and crushes it.)

Steven: *gasps* (Steven covers his mouth as Amethyst and Pearl raise their hands, Steven waves his hand at both of them and gets back down)

Peridot: Now to access the domestic warp. Huh? Huh. *looks at the Crying Breakfast Friends sticker* *looks around* This site may have been compromised. *walks back on the homeworld warp and places a green bleeping stone*

(The stone explodes and all of the robonoids are deactivated.)

Pearl: They're coming back. I can't do this! *covers her face with hands* Not again!

Amethyst: We're dead! We are so dead!

Steven: Was that another gem? Where did she come from? (Garnet starts to walk up towards the homeworld warp) What was she trying to do?

Garnet: It doesn't matter. *Summons giant gauntlets*

Steven: Whoa.

Amethyst: Oh.

(Everyone stares at Garnet as she smashes the homeworld warp)

Garnet: *grunting* She's not coming back!

[End]