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This is a transcribed copy of "Joy Ride". Feel free to edit or add to this page, as long as the information comes directly from the episode.
Previous: "Full Disclosure" Next: "Say Uncle"
Speaker Dialogue
[Opens on Beach]
(The Crystal Gems are clearing up the debris from the Gem Warship off the beach. Steven digs into the sand with a shovel and picks up a small piece of debris.)
Steven Do we really have to get every piece?
Amethyst *digs up large piece of debris* Yes!
Garnet *pulls out a larger piece from the sand* Yes, having a wrecked ship lying around is too dangerous. We've got to take care of it... all of it.
Pearl *piles the debris together* And we need to start looking for Peridot's escape pod too, assuming she even made it to Earth.
Garnet There's a lot of work ahead of us.
Steven *drops the small debris into a trash bag* On it.
(Steven walks to the other side of the beach and digs up a huge piece of debris.)
Steven Woah, that's a big one.
(Steven continues digging up some more debris when he thinks he hears someone calling his name.
Jenny Steven! Steven!
Steven Huh?
(Steven looks up and realizes it is Jenny, Buck and Sour Cream.)
Buck Yo!
Jenny Hey Steven, welcome back to Earth.
Steven What? Who told you?!
Buck You looked a million miles away, man.
Steven Oh, heh-heh. Sorry, I was zoning out.
Buck We were about to go chill in the parking lot and freak out some squares.
Jenny You should come with.
Steven Oh, but I— I don't have anything against squares. I like all basic shapes.
Buck *chuckles* Yeah, that's what I'm talking about. You got that much-needed counterpart to our cynical world view. You have to come.
Sour Cream It's good energy flow.
Steven Sorry, guys, but I got a lot of important gem work to do. Maybe later.
Jenny Aww.
Sour Cream Bummer.
Buck Well, catch you later, then.
(Jenny, Buck and Sour Cream walk away, and Steven keeps digging.)
[Trans. Int. Beach House, Night Time]
(Steven is lying on his bed, moaning in soreness.)
Steven Ugh, the calluses on my hands have calluses. A working man's burden is truly a heavy one. *rolls over and sighs*
(A thump is heard from the window beside Steven's bed. Steven crawls out of his bed and looks out the window, when a slice of pizza hits the window, startling him.)
Steven Huh, pizza rain, but no pizza clouds. Wah!
(Steven looks down and see Buck and Sour Cream hurling pizza slices at his windows. He then exits his house and approaches them.)
Steven What are you guys doing here? And why are you making it pizza rain?
Buck I only wanted to see you laughing, in the pizza rain.
Steven *confused* Is that a reference to something?
Buck C'mon. It's time to hang out.
Steven We can't hang out at night! Night is for dreaming.
Sour Cream Night is whatever you want it to be, time is an illusion.
Steven *ponders* Hmmm...
Buck Aren't you done working for the day?
Steven Hmm. Yeah... Okay, let's hang out!
Buck Nice!
Sour Cream But first, we have to deliver the rest of this pizza to Mr. Smiley.
(Jenny then approaches to drive Steven, Buck and Sour Cream out of town in her car.)
Jenny Whoo! Wind in your face, that's what I'm talking about!
Buck Breathe deep, Steven. This is the smell of freedom.
Steven *inhales* Freedom smells like pepperoni.
Jenny *laughs* That's just the car.
Sour Cream You know what food definitely doesn't smell like freedom? Fish!
Steven Why fish?
Jenny Uh oh, here we go.
Sour Cream I just don't get what's wrong with wantin' to be a deejay. But my step-dad was all on my case today saying— *imitates Yellowtail's murmurs mockingly* —Eugh. I'm just like, I don't want to be a fisherman. Everyone knows you can't rave in a raincoat, step-dad!
Buck At least he only bugs you about one thing. My dad's gotta say something about everything I do, 'cause I'm the mayor's son. And I'm like, you can't tell me what to do, I'm the mayor's... wait.
Jenny *laughs* Puh-lease, you're are walking in cake with that talk. You guys don't even know what bad is until you have a sister. Look, I don't know why I have to spell it out that I'm the evil twin and she's the good one! Don't ask me to help you with your homework, I'm at some metal concert.
Steven Family stuff is tricky. (The cool kids nod in agreement.) A few months back, my dad and the Gems grounded me from TV.
(The cool kids all respond at the same time.)
Buck That's the worst.
Sour Cream Bummer.
Jenny No way!
Steven And then I found out that the Gems are alien rebels, and there are other Gems out there that want us dead because they think we're traitors. And they tried to take me hostage because they think I'm my mom. And maybe I kinda am? *sighs* I wish I could talk to Garnet, Amethyst, and Pearl about it, but I think they kinda blame me for my mom not being around.
(There is an awkward silence between Steven and the cool kids. Jenny then turns off the radio.)
Jenny That's heavy.
Steven I guess.
Buck But you always seem so upbeat. You're a real champ, Steven Universe.
Sour Cream Yeah, I'd turn to fishing in a heartbeat if it meant not dealing with tha- THAT! *startled and points abruptly*
(Jenny quickly stops the car and it screeches to a halt.)
Sour Cream Look at that!
Jenny What?! What did I hit?! What is it?!
Sour Cream Glooowiiiing. *points at a green glowing aura in wheat field* We gotta check it out.
Buck I'm down.
Jenny Alright, hold on.
(Jenny shifts the car gear and starts driving into the wheat field. The groups then gets off the car and examine the strange crop formation.)
Sour Cream That's, like, as bright as like 600 glowsticks.
(The group approaches the center of the crop formation and discovers a beat-up pod in the middle of a crater.)
Steven Peridot's escape pod. *inhales deeply and turns to the cool kids* Okay, everybody step back. This is a gem machine and could be extremely dangerous.
Sour Cream *carries a rock over* Check it out.
Steven What are you doing?!
Sour Cream Ugh! *hurls the rock at the escape pod* Boom!
(The cool kids then approach to step into the crater.)
Steven Whoa, stop! Peridot might still be in there.
Buck Peri-what?
Jenny This biz is empty.
Buck *laughs* It looks so busted.
Steven You need to get away from there! *lifts Jenny away from the pod*
Jenny You need to relax. It's not doing anything.
Steven It's not just the pod. This means Peridot is just out there somewhere, trying to hurt the earth!
Buck Not cool, Earth forever! *kicks the pod*
Sour Cream Here come the rocks! *dumps more rocks on the pod*
Jenny Steven, come take a selfie with me and this thing.
Steven No, Jenny, I'm serious.
Jenny So am I. Sour Cream, what about you?
Sour Cream Sure, I'm down with whatever.
Jenny Buck?
Buck Nah, I like to just experience the moment for what it is sometimes. Plus the lighting is weird.
Jenny Ugh, okay. Steven. Last call. I got funny stickers.
(Jenny proceeds to take a series of selfies with Steven, Buck and Sour Cream. Steven appears initially stiffened, but eventually grows more flexible and comfortable.)
Jenny *squeals loudly* these are so good!
Steven How do I look?
Jenny You look great, look, stay right there, I'm going to take one more- *gasps* Steven, you should get in there.
Steven What?
Jenny Just for a second, one picture.
(Steven and the cool kids gather around the entrance of the pod. They chuckles together and Steven climbs in the pod.)
Jenny Okay, ready! 3, 2...
(Jenny takes more pictures of Steven in the pod, when he accidentally activates it.)
Sour Cream Dude!
Jenny Oh my gosh, Steven! Whaaaaaa. This is so cool!
Steven *starts controlling the pod* Whooooaaaaaaaa.
(The pod climbs out of the crater and tumbles on its head. It then begins spinning around with Steven inside, as the cool kids climb out too.)
Jenny Steven, how are you doing that?
Steven *rustling inside the pod* I think it listens to what my hands do. I really shouldn't be playing with this. I have to take this back to the Temple immediately.
Jenny No way, you just got it working!
Buck C'mon, aren't you your own mom? You can do whatever you want.
Sour Cream Yeah, you gotta do some donuts in that thing!
Buck At least a dozen, baker's dozen.
Jenny Seriously, Steven, you've been under a lot of pressure. Don't you think you deserve to have a little fun?
(Steven proceeds to have some fun inside the pod with the cool kid: Giving them a ride, racing with Jenny's car, crop grattiti, dancing etc.)
Jenny You really got the hang of that thing, huh?
Steven *laughs* Yeah, it always hooks to the left. I should really get it back to the gems though.
Cool Kids Nooo...
Steven ...Right after I jump that haystack!
Cool Kids Yeah, do it! Go, Steven! Yeah, whoo! *laugh*
Steven *jumps over the haystack and tumbles* I'm okay! *giggles* It's not actually so bad if you give it a little-
(Steven nudges the dented ceiling of the pod, and it closes up. The inside of the pod begins to light up.)
Steven Aah!
(The pod then begins levitating off the ground.)
Jenny Steven?
(A shockwave emits from the pod, knocking the cool kids backwards.)
Steven Guys?
(Green transparent goo begins filling up the pod. Steven holds his breath, thinking he cannot breath inside the goo, but exhales shortly, discovers he can breathe normally. The pod starts shooting lasers and its arsenal everywhere. The jerk causes Steven to accidentally activate a panel, sending out a flare. The cool kids run everywhere and scream, trying to escape from the pod's barrage.)
Jenny Steven! What's going on?
Steven Guys! Can you hear me? *gasps*
(The Crystal Gems then emerge from the smoke, caused by the laser barrage.)
Pearl I knew it! That flare led us right to the escape pod!
Amethyst What's going on here?!
Cool Kids Help! Over here!
Steven Garnet! Amethyst! Pearl!
Pearl We'll save you, humans! *hurls her spear through the pod, barely missing Steven inside* I can't believe it. Peridot's still inside.
Garnet She's probably weak from the landing. Don't hold back!
Amethyst Got it!
(Pearl throws another spear through the pod, while Amethyst grabs it with her whip.)
Cool Kids Wait! No!
Steven Whoa!
Garnet You got a lotta nerve taking refuge here. Of all places! *grabs the whip and starts pulling the pod down*
Steven Garnet?
Garnet But I don't know where you get off attacking defenseless humans in your dead-beat escape pod. *continues to pull it down*
Steven Garnet! It's me, Steven, can you hear me? Garnet!
Garnet And if you think you're safe here, well I got news for you. You lost! Now! *summons her gauntlets and prepares to punch the pod*
Steven Garnet, Garnet, Garnet!
Garnet Stay off my planet! *throws her fist at the pod*
Jenny *steps in front of Garnet's gauntlet* Stop! (Garnet halts immediately.) Steven's in there.
(Garnet then notices Steven inside and breaks the pod open, releasing him.)
Amethyst & Pearl Steven!
Amethyst What were you doing?
Pearl You found Peridot's escape pod and didn't come get us immediately!?
Amethyst Dude, we almost wrecked you.
Garnet Steven, this is unacceptable. I'm very disappointed in you.
Steven *sighs* You're right...
(The Cool Kids run up in front of Steven.)
Jenny Hey, cut him some slack!
Buck It's not his fault!
Sour Cream Just let him be a deejay!
Pearl ...Wha?
Sour Cream We just wanted Steven to have some fun. I don't know what's going on with aliens trying to abduct him, and him being his own mom. But it sounds like he's got a lot on his mind.
Jenny I'm sure whatever you're having him do is important, but everyone needs a break once in a while.
Buck He's just a kid.
Pearl *sighs* Maybe we have been a little hard on him.
Amethyst He did just break us out of space jail.
Garnet *sternly* Steven! *smiles* You're ungrounded from TV.
(Steven, astonished, smiles and runs up to Garnet to hug her. Jenny then takes another series of selfies with the cool kids and the Crystal Gems. The episode ends with a final shot of Sour Cream throwing another rock at the wrecked escape pod, shouting "I'm invincible!", with a sticker reading "Earth Forever!".)
[END]


ve Transcripts
Pilot Pilot
Season 1 A: Gem GlowLaser Light CannonCheeseburger BackpackTogether BreakfastFryboCat FingersBubble BuddiesSerious StevenTiger MillionaireSteven's LionArcade ManiaGiant WomanSo Many BirthdaysLars and the Cool KidsOnion TradeSteven the Sword FighterLion 2: The MovieBeach PartyRose's RoomCoach StevenJoking VictimSteven and the StevensMonster BuddiesAn Indirect KissMirror Gem/Ocean Gem

B: House GuestSpace RaceSecret TeamIsland AdventureKeep Beach City WeirdFusion CuisineGarnet's UniverseWatermelon StevenLion 3: Straight to VideoWarp TourAlone TogetherThe TestFuture VisionOn the RunHorror ClubWinter ForecastMaximum CapacityMarble MadnessRose's ScabbardOpen BookShirt ClubStory for StevenThe MessagePolitical PowerThe Return/Jail Break

Season 2 Full DisclosureJoy RideSay UncleLove LettersReformedSworn to the SwordRising Tides, Crashing SkiesKeeping It TogetherWe Need to TalkChille TidCry for HelpKeystone MotelOnion FriendHistorical FrictionFriend ShipNightmare HospitalSadie's SongCatch and ReleaseWhen It RainsBack to the BarnToo FarThe AnswerSteven's BirthdayIt Could've Been GreatMessage ReceivedLog Date 7 15 2
Season 3 Super Watermelon Island/Gem DrillSame Old WorldBarn MatesHit the DiamondSteven FloatsDrop Beat DadMr. GregToo Short to RideThe New LarsBeach City DriftRestaurant WarsKiki's Pizza Delivery ServiceMonster ReunionAlone at SeaGreg the BabysitterGem HuntCrack the WhipSteven vs. AmethystBismuthBetaEarthlingsBack to the MoonBubbled
Season 4 The Kindergarten KidKnow Your FusionBuddy's BookMindful EducationFuture Boy ZoltronLast One Out of Beach CityOnion GangGem HarvestThree Gems and a BabySteven's DreamAdventures in Light DistortionGem HeistThe ZooThat Will Be AllThe New Crystal GemsStorm in the RoomRocknaldoTiger PhilanthropistRoom for RubyLion 4: Alternate EndingDoug OutThe Good LarsAre You My Dad?I Am My Mom
Season 5 Stuck TogetherThe TrialOff ColorsLars' HeadDewey WinsGemcationRaising the BarnBack to the KindergartenSadie KillerKevin PartyLars of the StarsJungle MoonYour Mother and MineThe Big ShowPool HoppingLetters to LarsCan't Go BackA Single Pale RoseNow We're Only Falling ApartWhat's Your Problem?The QuestionMade of HonorReunitedLegs From Here to HomeworldFamiliarTogether AloneEscapismChange Your Mind
Film Steven Universe: The Movie
Future Little HomeschoolGuidanceRose BudsVolleyballBluebirdA Very Special EpisodeSnow DayWhy So Blue?Little GraduationPrickly PairIn DreamsBismuth CasualTogether ForeverGrowing PainsMr. UniverseFragmentsHomeworld BoundEverything's FineI Am My MonsterThe Future
Shorts Lion Loves to Fit in a BoxThe Classroom Gems: What Are Gems?We Are the Crystal GemsThe Classroom Gems: How Are Gems Made?UnboxingThe Classroom Gems: FusionCooking with LionGem KaraokeSteven ReactsVideo ChatSteven's Song Time
Other We Deserve to ShineCrossover Nexus
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