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{{TD||[Open Ext. [[Beach Citywalk Fries]]]}}
 
{{TD||[Open Ext. [[Beach Citywalk Fries]]]}}
{{TD||(<i>[[Steven Universe (character)|Steven]] and [[Amethyst]] run toward the counter of Beach Citywalk Fries.</i>)}}
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{{TD||(''[[Steven]] and [[Amethyst]] run towards the counter of Beach Citywalk Fries., as [[Mr. Fryman]] is entering the building.'') }}
{{TD|Steven|Hey, Fryman, give me the bits!}}
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{{TD|Steven |Hey, Fryman, give me the bits! }}
{{TD|[[Mr. Fryman]]|*flips sign* Steven! We’re closed.}}
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{{TD|Mr. Fryman |*flips a "We're Closed!" sign* Steven! We’re closed. }}
{{TD|Steven|*disappointed* Aww, what?}}
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{{TD|Steven |*disappointed* Aww, what? }}
{{TD|Amethyst|*hits counter* Give 'em the bits! *chants while continuously hitting the counter* The bits, the bits... (<i>Steven joins in.</i>)}}
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{{TD|Amethyst |*hits counter* Give 'em the bits! *chants while continuously hitting the counter* The BITS. The BITS.}}
{{TD|Steven & Amethyst|*both chanting* The BITS! The BITS! The BITS! *banging on counter*}}
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{{TD||(''Steven joins in the chanting.'') }}
{{TD|Mr. Fryman|Okay, okay! Take it easy on the counter, will ya? *goes to cook fry bits*}}
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{{TD|Steven & Amethyst|*both chanting* The BITS! The BITS! The BITS!- *banging on counter*}}
{{TD|Steven & Amethyst|Yes! *high-five each other*}}
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{{TD|Mr. Fryman |Okay, okay! Take it easy on the counter, will ya? *goes to retrieve the fry bits* }}
{{TD|Mr. Fryman|*hands Steven a bag of fry bits* I can give you actual fries if you want.}}
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{{TD|Steven & Amethyst |Yes! *hi-fives* }}
{{TD|Steven|Just the bits, please. *takes bag* Thanks. *walking away while Amethyst picks a handful of bits* Ah, sunset, my favorite time of day. When the sun goes down, and the ''second sun'' gets bigger and bigger in the sky.}}
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{{TD|Mr. Fryman |*empties the bits into a paper bag* I can give you actual fries if you want. *hands the bag to Steven*}}
{{TD|Amethyst|*bursts out laughing* Yeah, that big hot second su— *gasps, notices the [[Red Eye]]* Oh no, what is ''that'' doing here?}}
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{{TD|Steven |Just the bits, please. *takes the bag* Thanks! *Amethyst and him start walking away while eating the bits* Ah, sunset, my favorite time of day. When the sun goes down, and the second sun gets bigger and bigger in the sky. }}
{{TD|Steven|What is it? (<i>Amethyst picks him up and runs while Steven drops his bits.</i>) Ah, my bits!}}
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{{TD|Amethyst |*bursts out laughing* Yeah, that big hot second su— *long gasps, noticing a strange orb in the sky* Oh no, what is that doing here? }}
{{TD||[Trans. beach near [[Crystal Temple]]}}
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{{TD|Steven |Huh? What is it? (''Amethyst picks him up, causing him to drop the bag of bits.'') Ah, my bits! (''Amethyst carries him away.''}}
{{TD|[[Garnet]]|This is bad.}}
+
{{TD||[Trans. beach near [[Crystal Temple]]]}}
{{TD|[[Pearl]]|*peering through [[telescope]]* Look at the ''size'' of it, I had no idea these things were so ''big''!}}
+
{{TD||(''[[Garnet]] and [[Pearl]], looking through a telescope, are observing the strange orb.'')}}
{{TD|Amethyst|*running towards them carrying Steven* Garnet! Pearl!}}
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{{TD|Garnet |This is bad.}}
{{TD|Pearl|We saw. ''Some'' of us are trying to protect humanity. *angry* Where were you?}}
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{{TD|Pearl |Look at the size of it, I had no idea these things were so big! }}
{{TD|Amethyst|*puts Steven down* ... Eating fry bits. (<i>Pearl sighs.</i>)}}
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{{TD|Amethyst | Garnet! Pearl! *running towards them carrying Steven*}}
{{TD|Steven|Oh, can I see? *peers* Woah. It's a giant eyeball! Awesome!}}
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{{TD|Pearl |*visibly annoyed* We saw. Some of us are trying to protect humanity. Where were you? }}
{{TD|Pearl|*angrily* ''NOT'' awesome! It's a Red Eye!}}
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{{TD|Amethyst |*puts Steven down* ... Eating fry bits. (''Pearl groans.'') }}
{{TD|Steven|A Red Eye?! It’s going to infect us all!}}
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{{TD|Steven |Oh, can I see? *peers through the telescope* Woah. (''The orb rotates and opens into a eye.'') It's a giant eyeball! Awesome! }}
{{TD|Garnet|That’s ''pink'' eye, Steven. (<i>Amethyst laughs.</i>)}}
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{{TD|Pearl | ''NOT'' awesome! It's '''''a [[Red Eye]]!''''' }}
{{TD|Pearl|It’s going to crash into [[Beach City]] and ''crush'' us, along with a bunch of oblivious, innocent people! We ''have'' to stop it.}}
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{{TD|Steven |A red eye?! It’s going to infect us all! }}
{{TD|Steven|What are we going to do?}}
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{{TD|Garnet |That’s ''pink'' eye, Steven. (''Amethyst laughs.'') }}
{{TD|Garnet|*adjusts visor* The only thing powerful enough to destroy it is a [[Laser Light Cannon (object)|Light Cannon]] that belonged to [[Rose Quartz]].}}
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{{TD|Pearl |It’s going to crash into [[Beach City]] and crush us, along with a bunch of oblivious, innocent people! We have to stop it. }}
{{TD|Steven|My mom?}}
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{{TD|Steven |What are we going to do? }}
{{TD|Amethyst|*moans angrily* If Rose were here, this would be ''so'' easy.}}
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{{TD|Garnet |*adjusts her visor* The only thing powerful enough to destroy it is a [[Laser Light Cannon (object)|Laser Cannon]] that belonged to [[Rose Quartz]]. }}
{{TD|Pearl|I know, but she’s not, and the cannon is missing. We’ll have to find another solution.}}
+
{{TD|Steven |My mom? }}
{{TD|Steven|If it belonged to my mom, I bet my [[Greg Universe|dad]] knows where it is. He can help us save the day! *silence* Huh? Eah?! }}
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{{TD|Amethyst |*moans* If Rose were here, this would be so easy. }}
{{TD|Pearl|*sugarcoats her opinion of Greg* Greg is... ''nice'', Steven, but I doubt Rose would entrust someone like ''him'' with such a powerful weapon.}}
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{{TD|Pearl |I know, but she’s not, and the cannon is missing. We’ll have to find another solution. }}
{{TD|Amethyst|Your dad is kind of a mess, Steven. *puts hand on Steven's shoulder*}}
+
{{TD|Steven |If it belonged to my mom, I bet my [[Greg Universe|dad]] knows where it is. He can help us save the day! (''The [[Crystal Gems]] are speechless.'') Huh? Ehh!? }}
{{TD|Pearl|AMETHYST!}}
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{{TD|Pearl | Greg is... nice, Steven, but I doubt Rose would entrust someone like him with such a powerful weapon. }}
{{TD|Amethyst|I’m just sayin’, even if she ''did'' leave it with him, he probably broke it, or lost it, or dropped it in the ocean by now.}}
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{{TD|Amethyst |Your dad is kind of a mess, Steven. *puts her hand on Steven's shoulder* }}
{{TD|Garnet|True.}}
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{{TD|Pearl |Amethyst! }}
{{TD|Steven|No way, I’m sure he’s just keeping it somewhere safe. I’ll go ask him.}}
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{{TD|Amethyst |I’m just sayin’, even if she did leave it with him, he probably broke it, or lost it, or dropped it in the ocean by now. }}
{{TD|Garnet|We can handle this, Steven. *to Amethyst* Ready?}}
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{{TD|Garnet |True. }}
{{TD||(<i>Garnet picks up Amethyst and tosses her at the Red Eye, to no effect, making Amethyst fall into the ocean.</i>)}}
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{{TD|Steven |No way, I’m sure he’s just keeping it somewhere safe. I’ll go ask him. }}
{{TD|Steven|Ugh, I’m gonna go.}}
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{{TD|Garnet |We can handle this, Steven. *to Amethyst* Ready? }}
{{TD|Pearl|*half-heartedly* ... Okay, good luck.}}
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{{TD||(''Amethyst nods. Garnet picks her up, leaps into the air and tosses her at the Red Eye. Amethyst hits it with no impact at all and falls into the ocean. Garnet and Pearl are dumbfounded.'') }}
{{TD||[Ext. [[It's a Wash]]]}}
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{{TD|Steven |Ugh... I’m gonna go. }}
{{TD|Steven|*bangs on [[Greg's Van|van]] doors* Dad, it’s me! Dad, are you in there? Wake up! We have to save... the— WORLD! *climbs on van* Dad! *trips and sets off car alarm* *smiles*}}
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{{TD|Pearl |... Okay, good luck. }}
{{TD|Greg|*bursts out with a waffle iron* Who’s there? I have a waffle iron!}}
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{{TD||[Ext. [[It's a Wash]]] }}
{{TD|Steven|*on top of the van* Dad, it’s me!}}
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{{TD|Steven |*banging on the back doors of a [[Greg's Van|van]]* Dad, it’s me! Dad, are you in there? *starts ramming into it* Wake- '''UP!''' We have to ''save the- '''WORLD!''''' *climbs onto the van and start stomping on it* ''Dad!'' *trips and sets off the van's alarm, which he smiles at*}}
{{TD|Greg|*looks up* Steven? (<i>Steven jumps down and hugs his dad.</i>) I almost waffled your face! What are you doing up so late?}}
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{{TD|Greg |*bursts out of the van* Who’s there?! I have a waffle iron! *wielding a waffle iron*}}
{{TD|Steven|What do you mean? The sun just went down an hour ago.}}
+
{{TD|Steven |Dad, it’s me! }}
{{TD|Greg|*blushes* Oh, heh. It was a... slow day at the car wash. Anyway, what’s up? Just needed to see your old man, pal around, learn some lessons about life?}}
+
{{TD|Greg |*turns around and sees him, as he drops the waffle iron and shuts the van alarm off* Steven? (''Steven jumps down of the van and hugs him.'') I almost waffled your face! What are you doing up so late? }}
{{TD|Steven|*blushes* No! I need the light cannon that belonged to Mom, to blow up that eyeball! *points to the Red Eye*}}
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{{TD|Steven |What do you mean? The sun just went down an hour ago. }}
{{TD|Greg|Eyeball?}}
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{{TD|Greg |Oh, heh. *embarrassed* It was a... slow day at the car wash. Anyway, what’s up? Just needed to see your old man? Pal around? Learn some lessons about life? }}
{{TD|Steven|*points* ''That''!}}
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{{TD|Steven |*blushes* No! I need the light cannon that belonged to Mom, to blow up that eyeball! }}
{{TD|Amethyst|(<i>Amethyst is seen flying towards the Red Eye, but falls back into the ocean.</i>) Raaaah!!!}}
+
{{TD|Greg |Eyeball? }}
{{TD|Greg|Wait, is that a magical thing? The Gems told me not to get involved with magic stuff. It... it could be dangerous or interfere with what’s left of my hair. *rubs hair*}}
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{{TD|Steven |That! *points at the Red Eye* }}
{{TD|Steven|But they need Mom’s cannon. You've gotta know where it is, like a cave dungeon or a cloud fortress, or in a clam at the bottom of the ocean!}}
+
{{TD||(Amethyst is seen flying and yelling towards the Red Eye, hitting it, and falling back into the ocean again.)}}
{{TD|Greg|Well, I don’t know about all that. But I have an idea where it might be.}}
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{{TD|Greg |Wait, is that a magical thing? The Gems told me not to get involved with magic stuff. It... it could be dangerous or interfere with what’s left of my hair. *rubs the back of his head* }}
{{TD||[Ext. [[U-Stor]]]}}
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{{TD|Steven |But they need Mom’s cannon. You've gotta know where it is, like a cave dungeon or a cloud fortress, or in a clam at the bottom of the ocean! (''Greg puts up the waffle iron on the ground, throws it into the van and shuts the doors'')}}
{{TD|Steven|A magical storage unit! *rushes to U-Stor*}}
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{{TD|Greg |Well, I don’t know about all that. But I have an idea where it might be. }}
{{TD|Greg|Ha, not exactly. But some would say there’s magic inside. *winks as Steven who looks at him cluelessly* It’s just a shed I use to keep things that don’t fit in the van. If it’s anywhere, it’ll be in here.}}
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{{TD||[Ext. [[U-Stor]]] }}
{{TD||(<i>He opens the door and reveals a shed filled to the brim with boxes and clutter.</i>)}}
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{{TD|Steven |A magical storage unit! *runs towards the storage building* }}
{{TD|Steven|If I’m going in there, I’m gonna need some gear. *ties a flashlight to his head with sock and electric cord wrapped around waist* Here I go.}}
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{{TD|Greg |Ha, not exactly. But some would say there’s magic inside. *winks at Steven, who looks at him cluelessly* It’s just a shed I use to keep things that don’t fit in the van. If it’s anywhere, it’ll be in here. }}
{{TD|Greg|Good luck!}}
+
{{TD||(''Greg opens the door and reveals a shed filled to the brim with boxes and clutter. Steven tries to make his way in, but the first few boxes collapse in front of him.'') }}
{{TD|Steven|*crawls into shed* Woah, cool! It’s like a dad museum. *goes deeper* There it is! *pulls down golf clubs* Do you golf?}}
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{{TD|Steven |If I’m going in there, I’m gonna need some gear. *ties a flashlight to his head with a nearby sock, and an electric cord wrapped around his waist* Here I go. }}
{{TD|Greg|Eh, I’d like to think of myself as someone who would golf... eventually.}}
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{{TD|Greg |*holding the other end of the cord* Good luck! }}
{{TD|Steven|*notices cannon shaped object* Hmm, yes! ... A drum. *rummaging* No, no... *gasp* Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh! Is this— *shoots [[T-Shirt Cannon]]* “Buy T-shirt Cannons”? *notices box full of CDs* Hey, there’s a bunch of copies of your old CD! *gets one and stores it in his pocket*}}
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{{TD|Steven |*crawls into the shed* Woah, cool! It’s like a dad museum. *ventures deeper and notices a long object on the floor* There it is! *pulls it out, revealing to be a golf bag* Do you golf? }}
{{TD|Greg|Huh. Oh, man, I couldn’t ''give'' those things away. You know, before I ran the car wash, when I was a one-man band, I traveled the whole country.}}
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{{TD|Greg |Eh, I’d like to think of myself as someone who would golf... eventually. }}
{{TD|Steven|*chuckle* I know, Dad.}}
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{{TD|Steven |*sets the golf bag upright and notices another slender object* Hmm, yes! ... *sweeps off the various junk on top of it* A drum. *pats it once and continues rummaging deeper* No, no... *gasps* Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh! Is this— *shoots a cannon-like object, the projectile unravels into a shirt* “Buy [[T-Shirt Cannon]]s”? *notices a box full of CDs near him* Hey, there’s a bunch of copies of your old CD!}}
{{TD|Greg|When I came to play a concert here in Beach City, no one showed up except—}}
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{{TD|Greg |Huh. Oh, man, I couldn’t give those things away. You know, before I ran the car wash, when I was a one-man band, I traveled the whole country. }}
{{TD|Steven|An ALLIGATOR!}}
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{{TD|Steven |*chuckles as he keeps one of the CDs in his pocket* I know, Dad. }}
{{TD|Greg|No, it was your mother.}}
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{{TD|Greg |When I came to play a concert here in Beach City, no one showed up except— }}
{{TD|Steven|*goes deeper* Hahaha, I know.}}
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{{TD|Steven |An ALLIGATOR! }}
{{TD|Greg|And we were always together after that. Until she gave up her physical form to bring you into the world. I don’t know what a magic lady like her ever saw in a plain old ''dope'' like me.}}
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{{TD|Greg |No, it was your mother. }}
{{TD|Steven|*breaks photo frame of Greg and Rose, gasps* Uh, Dad, I broke a photo.}}
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{{TD|Steven |Hahaha, I know. *crawls deeper into the shed*}}
{{TD|Greg|It’s okay buddy. If every pork chop were perfect, we wouldn’t have hot dogs. *cannon begins to glow*}}
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{{TD|Greg |And we were always together after that. Until she gave up her physical form to bring you into the world. I don’t know what a magic lady like her ever saw in a plain old ''dope'' like me. }}
{{TD|Steven|*notices glow* Huh? *gasps* The light cannon!}}
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{{TD|Steven |*accidentally steps on a photo frame of Greg and Rose and gasps* Uh, Dad, I broke a photo. }}
{{TD|Greg|*looking at Red Eye* Oh boy, that thing’s giving me the willies. *rubs stomach*}}
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{{TD|Greg |It’s okay buddy. If every pork chop were perfect, we wouldn’t have hot dogs.}}
{{TD|Steven|Dad, I found it!}}
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{{TD|Steven |*something begins to glow near him* Huh? *gasps* The light cannon! }}
{{TD|Greg|Really?}}
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{{TD|Greg |*looking at Red Eye, nearer than before* Oh boy, that thing’s giving me the willies. *scratching his chest* }}
{{TD|Steven|*tying cord around cannon* Get the van! (<i>Greg pulls it out.</i>) This thing could save the city, we've gotta get it to the beach!}}
+
{{TD|Steven |Dad, I found it! }}
{{TD|Greg|How? It’s too big for the van. *wagon rolls by* Easy does it. *puts cannon on wagon*}}
+
{{TD|Greg |Really? }}
{{TD||[Int. Greg's Van]}}
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{{TD|Steven |*ties the electric cord around the cannon* Get the van! (With the other end tied to his van, Greg pulls the cannon out of the shed, along with all his other possessions, which collapse afterwards.) This thing could save the city, we've gotta get it to the beach! }}
{{TD||(<i>Steven and Greg are driving to the beach.</i>)}}
+
{{TD|Greg |How? It’s too big for the van. *a wagon rolls by*}}
{{TD|Steven|Is it gonna be okay?}}
+
{{TD||(''Greg ties the wagon to the van with the electric cord. Steven and Greg lift the heavy cannon.'')}}
{{TD|Greg|*shrugs* If every pork chop were perfect—}}
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{{TD|Greg|Easy does it. (''They drop the cannon onto the wagon, and its base breaks from the cannon's weight. Steven and Greg are speechless.'')}}
{{TD|Steven|*chimes in* We wouldn’t have hot dogs!}}
+
{{TD||[Int. Greg's Van] }}
{{TD|Greg|*watches enlarged Red Eye* That thing’s getting huge, it's freaking me out.}}
+
{{TD||(''Steven and Greg are driving to the beach, dragging the cannon with the damaged wagon.'') }}
{{TD|Steven|Can’t the van go any faster?}}
+
{{TD|Steven |Is it gonna be okay? }}
{{TD|Greg|This ''is'' faster.}}
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{{TD|Greg |*shrugs* If every pork chop were perfect— }}
{{TD|Steven|Don’t worry. Come on, let’s put on your CD.}}
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{{TD|Steven |*chimes in* ''We wouldn’t have hot dogs!''}}
{{TD|Greg|*embarrassed* What? Really? Come on, you’ve heard it.}}
+
{{TD|Greg |*watches the Red Eye getting bigger* That thing’s getting huge, it's freaking me out! }}
{{TD|Steven|*chuckling* ''You'' come on. *inserts disc*}}
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{{TD|Steven |Can’t the van go any faster? }}
{{TD|Steven|*singing along with "[[Let Me Drive My Van (into Your Heart)]]"* Let me drive my van into your heart! *song continues to play in the background*}}
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{{TD|Greg |*steps the van accelerator* This ''is'' faster!}}
{{TD||[Beach]}}
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{{TD|Steven |Don’t worry. Come on, let’s put on your CD. *holds up the CD he retrieved earlier* }}
{{TD|Amethyst|*washes up back on shore* Throw me again, I ''think'' I’m cracking it. *notices Steven* Is that... ?}}
+
{{TD|Greg |*embarrassed* What? Really? Come on, you’ve heard it. }}
{{TD|Steven|Hey, guys!}}
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{{TD|Steven |*chuckles* You come on. *inserts disc* }}
{{TD|Pearl|*gasps* He ''really'' had it!}}
+
{{TD||(''"[[Let Me Drive My Van (into Your Heart)]]" starts to play. Greg is visibly embarrassed. Steven starts to bounce and sing to the song. The van drives past [[Sadie]], [[Lars]] and [[Mr. Smiley]], all looking at the Red Eye, which has turned the environment into a red hue. The song continues to play in the background as they drive up next to Garnet and Pearl at the beach.'')}}
{{TD|Amethyst|*jumping in front of Garnet and Pearl* We’re SAVED!!!}}
+
{{TD|Amethyst |*gets washed up back on shore* Throw me again, I think I’m cracking it. *notices Steven, Greg and the cannon* Is that...? }}
{{TD||(<i>Red Eye’s gravity begins to pull everything towards it, causing rumbling and destruction.</i>)}}
+
{{TD|Steven |Hey, guys! }}
{{TD||[Trans. Ext. Beach Citywalk Fries]}}
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{{TD|Pearl |*gasps* He really had it! }}
{{TD||(<i>Fryman is observing the destruction affecting his restaurant.</i>)}}
+
{{TD|Amethyst | We’re ''SAVED!!!'' }}
{{TD|Fryman|Whoa, whoa, whoa, easy! (<i>A sign rips off of the building.</i>)}}
+
{{TD|Pearl, Amethyst & Garnet | Woah!}}
{{TD||[Trans. Beach]}}
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{{TD||(''Destruction begins to ensure as everything is being pulled away by the Red Eye’s gravitational force, such as the [[Beach House]], electric poles and the Beach Citywalk Fries.'') }}
{{TD|Garnet|We have to use it now.}}
+
{{TD|Mr. Fryman |Whoa, whoa, whoa, easy! (''The building's sign gets ripped off, and My. Fryman dodges out of its way.'') }}
{{TD|Pearl|I don’t know how it works, it was Rose’s!}}
+
{{TD||[Trans. Beach] }}
{{TD|Steven|Dad, how do we use it? (<i>Greg shrugs.</i>)}}
+
{{TD|Garnet |We have to use it now. }}
{{TD|Pearl|Steven, this is serious. *realizes* The gem. ''You'' have Rose’s gem.}}
+
{{TD|Pearl |I don’t know how it works, it was Rose’s! }}
{{TD|Amethyst|That’s it! *lifts Steven and rubs him against the cannon* Ah, come on!}}
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{{TD|Steven |Dad, how do we use it? (''Greg shrugs.'') }}
{{TD|Garnet|Stop that.}}
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{{TD|Pearl |*grabs Steven's shoulders* Steven, this is serious! *epiphanised* The gem. ''You'' have Rose’s gem! }}
{{TD|Pearl|It’s no use.}}
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{{TD|Amethyst |That’s it! *lifts Steven and start rubbing him against the cannon* Ahhh, come on! }}
{{TD|Amethyst|Fine, forget it. Throw ''me'' again.}}
+
{{TD|Garnet |Stop that. }}
{{TD|Pearl|That’s not going to work.}}
+
{{TD|Pearl |It’s no use. }}
{{TD||(<i>The gravitational pull intensifies and pulls the van and cannon.</i>)}}
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{{TD|Amethyst |Fine, forget it. Throw me again! *jumps onto Garnet's arm*}}
{{TD|Greg|*unhooks cord from cannon* I got this. *gets pulled* Ugh, wait, nope, maybe I don’t! *tries to stop van*}}
+
{{TD|Pearl |That’s ''not'' going to work. }}
{{TD|Steven|*to cannon* Please work, unlock, activate, go, please! Everyone’s counting on you, you can’t just be useless! I know you can help.}}
+
{{TD||(''The gravitational pull intensifies and starts to pull the van and the cannon too.'') }}
{{TD|Greg|It’s okay, Steven. We’ll figure out something else, something even better.}}
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{{TD|Greg |I got this. *unties the cord from the cannon, as the van continues to be pulled* Ugh, wait, nope, maybe I don’t! *gets dragged along with the van* }}
{{TD|Steven|R-r-r-right, if every pork chop were perfect, we wouldn’t have hot dogs. *cannon begins to activate*}}
+
{{TD|Steven |*starts banging on the cannon* Please work- unlock- activate- go- please! Everyone’s counting on you, you can’t just be useless! I know you can help. }}
{{TD|Pearl|It’s working!}}
+
{{TD|Greg |It’s okay, Steven. We’ll figure out something else, something even better. }}
{{TD||(<i>The cannon unlocks and falls. There is a collective gasp. Steven attempts to lift it and the Gems soon help.</i>)}}
+
{{TD|Steven |R-r-r-right, if every pork chop were perfect, we wouldn’t have hot dogs.}}
{{TD|Pearl|Steven!}}
+
{{TD||(''The cannon starts to glow and activate. Steven loses his grip and falls onto the ground.'') }}
{{TD|Amethyst|This is it!}}
+
{{TD|Pearl |It’s working! }}
{{TD|Garnet|BRACE YOURSELVES!!!}}
+
{{TD||(''The cannon's hinges unlock and the barrel falls onto the ground. The Crystal Gems gasp as it begins to prime itself. Steven tries to lift the cannon himself, and the Crystal Gems help in.'') }}
{{TD||(<i>The cannon shoots a rose shaped blast that destroys the Red Eye, causing it to explode and shrapnel to fall, destroying parts of the city boardwalk.</i>)}}
+
{{TD|Pearl |Steven! }}
{{TD|Amethyst|Steven, you just saved ''most'' of Beach City!}}
+
{{TD|Amethyst |This is it! }}
{{TD|Steven|*to Fryman* Sorry about that!}}
+
{{TD|Garnet |BRACE YOURSELVES!!! }}
{{TD|Fryman|What?}}
+
{{TD||(The cannon fires a rose-shaped beam at the Red Eye, shattering and destroying it. Shrapnel from the blast begin to fall around the beach and destroying parts of the city boardwalk.) }}
{{TD|Pearl|How did you get it to work?}}
+
{{TD|Amethyst |Steven, you just saved most of Beach City! }}
{{TD|Steven|I just said that thing that Dad always says.}}
+
{{TD|Steven |*to Mr. Fryman* Sorry about that! }}
{{TD|Pearl|That thing about pork rinds?}}
+
{{TD|Mr. Fryman |*yells back* ''What?''}}
{{TD|Garnet|Hot dogs.}}
+
{{TD|Pearl |How did you get it to work? }}
{{TD|Greg|*tears up* Rose...}}
+
{{TD|Steven |I just said that thing that Dad always says. }}
{{TD||(<i>The tide suddenly comes in and washes the van towards the beach but is still surrounded by water. There is collective laughter.</i>)}}
+
{{TD|Pearl |That thing about pork rinds? }}
{{TD|Greg|My van!}}
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{{TD|Garnet |*pats on Pearl's shoulder* Hot dogs. }}
{{TD|Steven|It’s okay, Dad, if every pork chop were perfect—}}
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{{TD|Greg |Rose... *wipes away a tear*}}
{{TD|Greg|I LIVE in there! *rushes towards van*}}
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{{TD||(''The tide suddenly raises in and everyone starts laughing. Greg notices his van getting washed past him by the tide.'') }}
{{TD|Steven|Wait up! *goes towards van*}}
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{{TD|Greg |My van! }}
{{TD|Greg|Oh geez, wait, wait, wait!}}
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{{TD|Steven |It’s okay, Dad, if every pork chop were perfect— }}
{{TD||[END]}}
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{{TD|Greg |I ''live'' in there! *rushes towards the van* }}
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{{TD|Steven |Wait up! *chases after* }}
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{{TD|Greg |Oh geez, wait, wait, wait! }}
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{{TD||(''Greg and Steven slowly track through the water towards the van, slowly being washed towards the ocean. The star iris zooms in on the van, ending the episode.'') }}
  +
{{TD||[END] }}
 
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}}
{{Transcriptnav}}
 
 
[[Category:Transcripts]]
 
[[Category:Transcripts]]
 
[[Category:A to Z]]
 
[[Category:A to Z]]

Revision as of 18:15, March 13, 2020

This is a transcribed copy of Laser Light Cannon (episode). Feel free to edit or add to this page, as long as the information comes directly from the episode.
Previous: "Gem Glow" Next: "Cheeseburger Backpack"
Speaker Dialogue
[Open Ext. Beach Citywalk Fries]
(Steven and Amethyst run towards the counter of Beach Citywalk Fries., as Mr. Fryman is entering the building.)
Steven Hey, Fryman, give me the bits!
Mr. Fryman *flips a "We're Closed!" sign* Steven! We’re closed.
Steven *disappointed* Aww, what?
Amethyst *hits counter* Give 'em the bits! *chants while continuously hitting the counter* The BITS. The BITS.
(Steven joins in the chanting.)
Steven & Amethyst *both chanting* The BITS! The BITS! The BITS!- *banging on counter*
Mr. Fryman Okay, okay! Take it easy on the counter, will ya? *goes to retrieve the fry bits*
Steven & Amethyst Yes! *hi-fives*
Mr. Fryman *empties the bits into a paper bag* I can give you actual fries if you want. *hands the bag to Steven*
Steven Just the bits, please. *takes the bag* Thanks! *Amethyst and him start walking away while eating the bits* Ah, sunset, my favorite time of day. When the sun goes down, and the second sun gets bigger and bigger in the sky.
Amethyst *bursts out laughing* Yeah, that big hot second su— *long gasps, noticing a strange orb in the sky* Oh no, what is that doing here?
Steven Huh? What is it? (Amethyst picks him up, causing him to drop the bag of bits.) Ah, my bits! (Amethyst carries him away.
[Trans. beach near Crystal Temple]
(Garnet and Pearl, looking through a telescope, are observing the strange orb.)
Garnet This is bad.
Pearl Look at the size of it, I had no idea these things were so big!
Amethyst Garnet! Pearl! *running towards them carrying Steven*
Pearl *visibly annoyed* We saw. Some of us are trying to protect humanity. Where were you?
Amethyst *puts Steven down* ... Eating fry bits. (Pearl groans.)
Steven Oh, can I see? *peers through the telescope* Woah. (The orb rotates and opens into a eye.) It's a giant eyeball! Awesome!
Pearl NOT awesome! It's a Red Eye!
Steven A red eye?! It’s going to infect us all!
Garnet That’s pink eye, Steven. (Amethyst laughs.)
Pearl It’s going to crash into Beach City and crush us, along with a bunch of oblivious, innocent people! We have to stop it.
Steven What are we going to do?
Garnet *adjusts her visor* The only thing powerful enough to destroy it is a Laser Cannon that belonged to Rose Quartz.
Steven My mom?
Amethyst *moans* If Rose were here, this would be so easy.
Pearl I know, but she’s not, and the cannon is missing. We’ll have to find another solution.
Steven If it belonged to my mom, I bet my dad knows where it is. He can help us save the day! (The Crystal Gems are speechless.) Huh? Ehh!?
Pearl Greg is... nice, Steven, but I doubt Rose would entrust someone like him with such a powerful weapon.
Amethyst Your dad is kind of a mess, Steven. *puts her hand on Steven's shoulder*
Pearl Amethyst!
Amethyst I’m just sayin’, even if she did leave it with him, he probably broke it, or lost it, or dropped it in the ocean by now.
Garnet True.
Steven No way, I’m sure he’s just keeping it somewhere safe. I’ll go ask him.
Garnet We can handle this, Steven. *to Amethyst* Ready?
(Amethyst nods. Garnet picks her up, leaps into the air and tosses her at the Red Eye. Amethyst hits it with no impact at all and falls into the ocean. Garnet and Pearl are dumbfounded.)
Steven Ugh... I’m gonna go.
Pearl ... Okay, good luck.
[Ext. It's a Wash]
Steven *banging on the back doors of a van* Dad, it’s me! Dad, are you in there? *starts ramming into it* Wake- UP! We have to save the- WORLD! *climbs onto the van and start stomping on it* Dad! *trips and sets off the van's alarm, which he smiles at*
Greg *bursts out of the van* Who’s there?! I have a waffle iron! *wielding a waffle iron*
Steven Dad, it’s me!
Greg *turns around and sees him, as he drops the waffle iron and shuts the van alarm off* Steven? (Steven jumps down of the van and hugs him.) I almost waffled your face! What are you doing up so late?
Steven What do you mean? The sun just went down an hour ago.
Greg Oh, heh. *embarrassed* It was a... slow day at the car wash. Anyway, what’s up? Just needed to see your old man? Pal around? Learn some lessons about life?
Steven *blushes* No! I need the light cannon that belonged to Mom, to blow up that eyeball!
Greg Eyeball?
Steven That! *points at the Red Eye*
(Amethyst is seen flying and yelling towards the Red Eye, hitting it, and falling back into the ocean again.)
Greg Wait, is that a magical thing? The Gems told me not to get involved with magic stuff. It... it could be dangerous or interfere with what’s left of my hair. *rubs the back of his head*
Steven But they need Mom’s cannon. You've gotta know where it is, like a cave dungeon or a cloud fortress, or in a clam at the bottom of the ocean! (Greg puts up the waffle iron on the ground, throws it into the van and shuts the doors)
Greg Well, I don’t know about all that. But I have an idea where it might be.
[Ext. U-Stor]
Steven A magical storage unit! *runs towards the storage building*
Greg Ha, not exactly. But some would say there’s magic inside. *winks at Steven, who looks at him cluelessly* It’s just a shed I use to keep things that don’t fit in the van. If it’s anywhere, it’ll be in here.
(Greg opens the door and reveals a shed filled to the brim with boxes and clutter. Steven tries to make his way in, but the first few boxes collapse in front of him.)
Steven If I’m going in there, I’m gonna need some gear. *ties a flashlight to his head with a nearby sock, and an electric cord wrapped around his waist* Here I go.
Greg *holding the other end of the cord* Good luck!
Steven *crawls into the shed* Woah, cool! It’s like a dad museum. *ventures deeper and notices a long object on the floor* There it is! *pulls it out, revealing to be a golf bag* Do you golf?
Greg Eh, I’d like to think of myself as someone who would golf... eventually.
Steven *sets the golf bag upright and notices another slender object* Hmm, yes! ... *sweeps off the various junk on top of it* A drum. *pats it once and continues rummaging deeper* No, no... *gasps* Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh! Is this— *shoots a cannon-like object, the projectile unravels into a shirt* “Buy T-Shirt Cannons”? *notices a box full of CDs near him* Hey, there’s a bunch of copies of your old CD!
Greg Huh. Oh, man, I couldn’t give those things away. You know, before I ran the car wash, when I was a one-man band, I traveled the whole country.
Steven *chuckles as he keeps one of the CDs in his pocket* I know, Dad.
Greg When I came to play a concert here in Beach City, no one showed up except—
Steven An ALLIGATOR!
Greg No, it was your mother.
Steven Hahaha, I know. *crawls deeper into the shed*
Greg And we were always together after that. Until she gave up her physical form to bring you into the world. I don’t know what a magic lady like her ever saw in a plain old dope like me.
Steven *accidentally steps on a photo frame of Greg and Rose and gasps* Uh, Dad, I broke a photo.
Greg It’s okay buddy. If every pork chop were perfect, we wouldn’t have hot dogs.
Steven *something begins to glow near him* Huh? *gasps* The light cannon!
Greg *looking at Red Eye, nearer than before* Oh boy, that thing’s giving me the willies. *scratching his chest*
Steven Dad, I found it!
Greg Really?
Steven *ties the electric cord around the cannon* Get the van! (With the other end tied to his van, Greg pulls the cannon out of the shed, along with all his other possessions, which collapse afterwards.) This thing could save the city, we've gotta get it to the beach!
Greg How? It’s too big for the van. *a wagon rolls by*
(Greg ties the wagon to the van with the electric cord. Steven and Greg lift the heavy cannon.)
Greg Easy does it. (They drop the cannon onto the wagon, and its base breaks from the cannon's weight. Steven and Greg are speechless.)
[Int. Greg's Van]
(Steven and Greg are driving to the beach, dragging the cannon with the damaged wagon.)
Steven Is it gonna be okay?
Greg *shrugs* If every pork chop were perfect—
Steven *chimes in* We wouldn’t have hot dogs!
Greg *watches the Red Eye getting bigger* That thing’s getting huge, it's freaking me out!
Steven Can’t the van go any faster?
Greg *steps the van accelerator* This is faster!
Steven Don’t worry. Come on, let’s put on your CD. *holds up the CD he retrieved earlier*
Greg *embarrassed* What? Really? Come on, you’ve heard it.
Steven *chuckles* You come on. *inserts disc*
("Let Me Drive My Van (into Your Heart)" starts to play. Greg is visibly embarrassed. Steven starts to bounce and sing to the song. The van drives past Sadie, Lars and Mr. Smiley, all looking at the Red Eye, which has turned the environment into a red hue. The song continues to play in the background as they drive up next to Garnet and Pearl at the beach.)
Amethyst *gets washed up back on shore* Throw me again, I think I’m cracking it. *notices Steven, Greg and the cannon* Is that...?
Steven Hey, guys!
Pearl *gasps* He really had it!
Amethyst We’re SAVED!!!
Pearl, Amethyst & Garnet Woah!
(Destruction begins to ensure as everything is being pulled away by the Red Eye’s gravitational force, such as the Beach House, electric poles and the Beach Citywalk Fries.)
Mr. Fryman Whoa, whoa, whoa, easy! (The building's sign gets ripped off, and My. Fryman dodges out of its way.)
[Trans. Beach]
Garnet We have to use it now.
Pearl I don’t know how it works, it was Rose’s!
Steven Dad, how do we use it? (Greg shrugs.)
Pearl *grabs Steven's shoulders* Steven, this is serious! *epiphanised* The gem. You have Rose’s gem!
Amethyst That’s it! *lifts Steven and start rubbing him against the cannon* Ahhh, come on!
Garnet Stop that.
Pearl It’s no use.
Amethyst Fine, forget it. Throw me again! *jumps onto Garnet's arm*
Pearl That’s not going to work.
(The gravitational pull intensifies and starts to pull the van and the cannon too.)
Greg I got this. *unties the cord from the cannon, as the van continues to be pulled* Ugh, wait, nope, maybe I don’t! *gets dragged along with the van*
Steven *starts banging on the cannon* Please work- unlock- activate- go- please! Everyone’s counting on you, you can’t just be useless! I know you can help.
Greg It’s okay, Steven. We’ll figure out something else, something even better.
Steven R-r-r-right, if every pork chop were perfect, we wouldn’t have hot dogs.
(The cannon starts to glow and activate. Steven loses his grip and falls onto the ground.)
Pearl It’s working!
(The cannon's hinges unlock and the barrel falls onto the ground. The Crystal Gems gasp as it begins to prime itself. Steven tries to lift the cannon himself, and the Crystal Gems help in.)
Pearl Steven!
Amethyst This is it!
Garnet BRACE YOURSELVES!!!
(The cannon fires a rose-shaped beam at the Red Eye, shattering and destroying it. Shrapnel from the blast begin to fall around the beach and destroying parts of the city boardwalk.)
Amethyst Steven, you just saved most of Beach City!
Steven *to Mr. Fryman* Sorry about that!
Mr. Fryman *yells back* What?
Pearl How did you get it to work?
Steven I just said that thing that Dad always says.
Pearl That thing about pork rinds?
Garnet *pats on Pearl's shoulder* Hot dogs.
Greg Rose... *wipes away a tear*
(The tide suddenly raises in and everyone starts laughing. Greg notices his van getting washed past him by the tide.)
Greg My van!
Steven It’s okay, Dad, if every pork chop were perfect—
Greg I live in there! *rushes towards the van*
Steven Wait up! *chases after*
Greg Oh geez, wait, wait, wait!
(Greg and Steven slowly track through the water towards the van, slowly being washed towards the ocean. The star iris zooms in on the van, ending the episode.)
[END]
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