I really only changed the first paragraph. The other paragraph in the Personality section could be trimmed down to be more effective.
As for the work I did, I thought the word choice was both accurate and slightly lyrical. It's not right to say that she's just cruel, gems are more complicated than that. Now looking at the changes others have made, I find the replacement word "effectiveness" to not only be a poor change, it totally changes the message of the sentence.
I agree that's important. Even if they don't know the exact definition, I think they should be able to parse it out from context clues. I do think that "effectiveness" needs to be changed back to something more similar to what I said lest the reader think the sentence is a compliment though.