Speaker
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Dialogue
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(Steven is reading 'Destiny's End,' the last book in the "Spirit Morph Saga.")
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Steven
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*turns page, closes book, and exhales*
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Connie
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*clears her throat* So... what did you think of the ending?
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Steven
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Uh, I thought it was on page 917?
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Connie
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I thought it was a disaster!
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Steven
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*sweating* Uuuhhh...
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Connie
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*stands up and begins pacing around* All the books leading up to this seemed to be taking on and subverting these "witch tropes" ... really self-aware about being a pastiche, you know?
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Steven
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Uhm-
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Connie
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But in the end, none of that even mattered. Lisa and her talking falcon, rebels challenging the stifling traditions of the magical bureaucracy? I loved that. Then her falcon turns into a human and they get married?! It completely dropped all the anti-authoritarian stuff and described a wedding cake for fifty pages!
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Steven
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*going along with it* Yeah, that cake was worthy of twenty pages, tops. There weren't even strawberries on it.
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Connie
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I bet since the books got so popular, the publisher put pressure on the author to water down the end for a larger audience appeal. (Steven looks uneasy.) Unlike art, the real world can't always win against the iron chains of authority. *lies down on the couch next to Steven, sighing deeply* That's my theory, anyway.
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Steven
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Hmm...
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Connie
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It's just disappointing, considering I invested extra money in the hard cover copies... *takes the book from Steven's hands and opens it, colored maps fall out* ... with maps.
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Steven
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I wish I could give you a new ending.
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(Connie looks at him and smiles.)
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(Steven's gem glows, activating Rose's Room. They get up to investigate the opened door.)
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Steven
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The temple door! It opened for me! *gasps* I can make anything I want in there! I can make us a new ending!
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Connie
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Really? Well, what are we waiting for?
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(The two run inside Rose's Room.)
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Steven
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Uh... ta-da!
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Connie
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Cool.
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Steven
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This is my mom's room. I can control it, like this. *announces loudly* I want a tiny floating whale to give me some fin!
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(Whale appears, gives him a fin-five, makes a tiny "ah-ooo" sound, and disappears.)
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Connie
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*astonished* Unbelievable! How does it work?
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Steven
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The room can make stuff out of clouds. We can make anything.
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Connie
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Anything? How about the Infinity Fair from Book Four? With merchants from a million lands, selling goods from cultures long gone and yet to be!
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Steven
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We should probably keep it simple. We don't want to overload the room.
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Connie
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How about half the Infinity Fair? ... No, that's still infinity. Simple. Okay, well, what really matters are the characters. You should be Archamicarus.
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Steven
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Okay. Room, I want to be a falcon! [Dramatic music plays] (A falcon costume appears on him, and he poses in front of a background of a large falcon in flight.) Oh, yeah, gotta keep it simple. [Music stops and background falcon disappears]
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Connie
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*claps* Amazing! Okay, my turn. Room, I want to be Lisa. (Nothing happens.) Do I need to be more specific? You were pretty general with the falcon thing.
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Steven
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Oh, sorry. I guess the room just makes things when I want it. Maybe this won't work after all...
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Connie
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Why don't you just have it make a costume shop?
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Steven
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Oh yeah, good idea. I want a costume shop!
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(A costume shop appears. Connie runs inside the shop.)
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Connie
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Wow, this place has everything! Even the childhood tunic! Wait, you thought it was red?
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Steven
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Yeah, the color of the setting sun.
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Connie
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*matter-of-factly* The sun sets black over the mine, Steven.
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Steven
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Are you going to be young Lisa?
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Connie
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Well, if we're really reworking this thing, I'm gonna make the ultimate Lisa, with the best gear from every book! Like... what if she never lost her iron sword?
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Steven
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Whoa!
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Connie
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And the cloak and the clasp are too signature not to do.
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Steven
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For sure!
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Connie
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And I always liked the dragon whisker boots from the volcano stuff in Book Three.
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Steven
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Are you almost done?
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Connie
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Wait a minute!
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Steven
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*blushes* Come out, I want to see you!
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(Cloud Connie comes out of costume shop, outfitted in a Robin Hood-esque outfit, complete with an eye patch.)
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Steven
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Whoa, you look awesome.
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Cloud Connie
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*blushes* Thanks.
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Steven
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Okay, lets do this!
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(Steven and Cloud Connie run off laughing to somewhere else in the room.)
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Steven
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So, at the end of the series, Lisa and her falcon familiar, Archamicarus, are at the altar... [Altar appears] With a cleric... [Priest appears] About to get married. (Connie's outfit becomes a wedding dress, and Steven is down on one knee.) But we don't want that ending. [Wedding scene and clothes disappear] So instead, hmm, uhhh, I don't know. What do you think?
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Cloud Connie
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Hmm, what do you think?
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Steven
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*caught off-guard* Uhh, well, h-how about a different proposal, Lisa... a business proposal! We can start a business together and sell... uh, sell... turkey legs to make money to help out our fellow rebel comrades!
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Cloud Connie
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Yeah, that's great!
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[A food cart appears]
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Steven
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I want an umbrella with that, if you would, Room.
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[Umbrella appears]
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Steven
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Turkey Legs! Get your rebel turkey legs!
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[Buildings appear and disappear as they walk by]
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Steven
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You think its okay for me to eat this if I'm a falcon?
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Cloud Connie
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You are a bird of prey.
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Steven
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So... what should our next move be as business partners?
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Cloud Connie
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You tell me!
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Steven
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Yeah? Oh, um... let's feed the Wind Lizard!
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[Wind Lizard appears]
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Steven
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*laughs* Look at this guy, he totally looks like a rebel!
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Cloud Connie
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Wow, from Book Four!
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Wind Lizard
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*screeches*
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Steven
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Now, I know he lives in the mountains but he's just visiting because he heard about these turkey legs. Lisa, would you like to do the honors?
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Cloud Connie
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Okay!
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Wind Lizard
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*screeches and eats the whole turkey leg*
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Cloud Connie
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He ate the bones!
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Steven
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Okay! *scratches head* I guess our business is a success!
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Cloud Connie
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If you think so!
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Steven
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So, what now? Didn't you have a bunch of ideas? That it needed to more anti-authority and stuff?
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Cloud Connie
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Sure!
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Steven
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... Okaaaaaaay.
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[Wind Lizard disappears]
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Steven
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So, we're... we're stopped by the authorities?
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[Knights appear]
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Steven
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Because... because we're selling without a permit!
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[Scroll appears in one knight's hand]
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Steven
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And we're not old enough to drive a cart!
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[Scroll appears in another knight's hand]
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Steven
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But these are uh, free-range turkeys! And they didn't listen to anybody, and that's what we're gonna do... right?
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Cloud Connie
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Whatever you think!
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Steven
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Really? All right. And then, I think they... don't like that, and they attack us!
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[Axes appear in the knights hands]
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Steven
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You can't stop us! *throws turkey leg*
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(The knights advance, and start attacking the cart.)
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Steven
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Jeez, these guys are corrupt! What should we do about 'em huh?
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Cloud Connie
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What do you think we should do?
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Steven
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*blushes* C-come on I'm really trying here! How do you want this story to end?
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Cloud Connie
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How do you want this story to end?
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Steven
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I don't know! I just wanted to do this for you. This isn't really like you I- *sigh* I don't want you to just do what I want.
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Cloud Connie
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Uh, you want me to not d-do what you want?
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Steven
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Connie, are you all right?
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Cloud Connie
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I want what you want, what you want-want-want-want *repeats*
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[Flashback]
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Steven
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I want a tiny floating whale to give me some fin! [Whale appears] I want a costume shop! [Shop appears] I wanna see you! [Cloud Connie comes out]
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Steven
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I-I created you! You're not Connie! I must've left the real Connie back at the costume shop. Sh-she could be anywhere! No, no, no, no, NO! I'm done, I'm done playing! *Steven's costume poofs away*
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(Steven poofs away his costume, the grass, the turkey cart, and then the knights. He tries to poof Cloud Connie away but she comes back.)
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Steven
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*gasps*
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(Cloud Connie reforms.)
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Steven
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*sweating* Why didn't you disappear with everything else?
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Connie
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You told me not to do what you wanted.
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Steven
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Uh... RRRRNG- where is Connie?
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Connie
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*distantly* Steven? Steven?
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Steven
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Connie? C-Connie, Is that you?
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(Cloud Connie grabs Steven's hand.)
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Steven
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*gasp* Please let me go, I want to find the real Connie!
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Cloud Connie
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You told me you wanted-
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Steven
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That doesn't matter! *runs while panting, while Cloud Connie chases after* Please don't follow me, I don't want you to follow me!
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[Pans to Cloud Connie not responding]
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Steven
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*still gasping* Cart!
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[Cart appears and Cloud Connie jumps over it]
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Steven
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AH, uh, WIND LIZARD!
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[Wind Lizard appears]
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Wind Lizard
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*screeches*
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(Steven climbs on Wind Lizard while Cloud Connie follows suit.)
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Steven
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*stammering* Connie can you hear me?
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Connie
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Steven? Steven?!
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Steven
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Connie, I'm almost there, just a little bit further! AH! (Cloud Connie pushes Steven off.)
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(Steven falls and hits the cloud ground as Cloud Connie lands behind him.)
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Cloud Connie
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Rrrr.
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Steven
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Please, I don't want you, I want the REAL Connie!
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Cloud Connie
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I know what you really want, I know how you REALLY feel! (The wedding gown from before appears on her.)
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Connie
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Steven? *runs through clouds* Ah Steven finally, there you... are.
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[Pans to Cloud Connie pinning down Steven]
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Steven
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*stammering* Help!
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(Connie runs to Cloud Connie and pushes her away.)
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Connie
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AH!
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Cloud Connie
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*grunting noises*
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Connie
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Keep away from him! *slashes sword*
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(Cloud Connie poofs away, but poofs back.)
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Cloud Connie
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*to Steven* I know you like her!
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(Connie lifts up sword to defend Steven.)
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Cloud Connie
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And I know you want her to like you too.
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Steven
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No, don't listen! *tears up*
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(Connie slashes Cloud Connie causing her to poof away again.)
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(Cloud Connie poofs back on top of Steven.)
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Cloud Connie
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That's why you can't tell her the truth, but you WANT to! You wanna tell her!
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Steven
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No!
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(Connie runs toward them.)
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Connie
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Get off of him!
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Cloud Connie
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Tell her Steven!
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Steven
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I- unggggh...
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Cloud Connie
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Tell her!
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Steven
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Mmmmrng... - I liked the ending of the book!
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(Connie stops.)
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Connie
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What?
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Steven
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I-I thought it was sweet that Lisa and Archimicarus got together in the end! They were always so thoughtful towards each other, and I was so happy when they found the spell to make him human, and I loved every page about the cake, I wanted to draw a picture of it! I'm-I'm sorry I pretended not to like it, I just didn't want you to think less of me.
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Cloud Connie
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*sigh* That's better.
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(Cloud Connie poofs away.)
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(Connie walks towards Steven.)
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Steven
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Do-do you think I'm a bad person for liking the ending?
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Connie
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Of course not I... Steven it's just a book!
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Steven
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But, you really care about it!
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Connie
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I care about you more.
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Steven
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Even though I liked the wedding.
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Connie
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Oh, of course you liked the wedding...You're Steven, you love "schmaltz".
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(Connie helps Steven up.)
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(The gem door opens allowing Steven and Connie to exit.)
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Steven
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You make a good point, but don't you remember how Archimicarus cried in Book Three?
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Connie
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I thought that was because they lost the sword!
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Steven
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No, she almost fell into the volcano! He was worried about her!
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Connie
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But she had access to frost spells.
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Steven
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Yeah but Archimicarus didn't know that! Even birds can fall in love!
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Connie
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I guess you could read it that way!
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[Pans to Steven's drawing of Lisa and Archimicarus, as Star iris closes in and fades to black]
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[END]
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