| Speaker
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Dialogue
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| [Open Int. Galaxy Warp]
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| (The Crystal Gems arrive on a Warp Pad, leading a series of other Warp Pads.)
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| Steven
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Woah.
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| Garnet
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*steps on a Warp Pad* Inactive.
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| (Steven proceeds to paste a sticker of a crying apple on the Warp Pad.)
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| Amethyst
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*jumps onto another Warp Pad* Inactive!
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| (Steven runs over and paste another sticker on the Warp Pad, this time of a crying crossiant.)
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| Pearl
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*standing on another Warp Pad in disappointment* Inactive.
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| (Steven pastes another sticker of a crying pear on the Warp Pad.)
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| Amethyst
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Do we have to check all of them? They're all still inactive, like always.
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| Garnet
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We need to make sure.
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| Steven
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I've never seen so many Warp Pads before! *gets two stickers* I hope I have enough of these Crying Breakfast Friends stickers. Where do all these Warp Pads go, anyway?
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| Pearl
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*sits on the Warp Pad she was standing on* Well, Steven, these Warp Pads were used to travel off-planet. They were our connection to the Gem Homeworld and to Gem-controlled planets all over the universe.
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| Steven
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*gasps* You mean we could go anywhere we want in outer space?
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| Amethyst
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Yeah... We could do that if they weren't all busted.
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| Pearl
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It's true. The Galaxy Warp have all been inactive for thousands of years.
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| Steven
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Can't we fix them?
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| Garnet
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... No.
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| Pearl
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It's fine. *chuckles* I'll always have my memories of other worlds. But now I'm here. On Earth. Forever.
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| Steven
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With me!
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| Pearl
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Right, with you. *walks up to a broken Warp Pad* It really is incredible out there, though. I wish you could see it, Steven.
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| (Steven, seeing that the Warp Pad is visibly broken, pastes asticker of a crying waffle on it.)
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| [Trans. Ext. It's A Wash]
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| (Greg and Steven are watching 'Crying Breakfast Friends!' outside. On-screen, various breakfast-themed characters are crying, such as Crying Waffle, Crying Pear, Sad Apple and Spilled Milk.)
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| TV Narrator
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Stay tuned for another episode of Crying Breakfast Friends!
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| Greg
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Yeesh. I must be getting old. I used to like cartoons.
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| Steven
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Hey, Dad, did you know the Gems used to travel all over outer space?
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| Greg
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*chuckles* Yeah. They're pretty far out, son.
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| Steven
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I think Pearl really misses going out there. *sees a comet print on Greg's Van* Dad, can you help me build a spaceship?
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| Greg
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... You know, that might be a little outside my skill set. How 'bout a bunk bed with wings? I could probably do that.
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| Steven
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No way! We could totally build a spaceship! *stands up on a chair* People have done it before, and we're people!
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| Greg
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We are people.
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| Steven
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And Pearl would love it so much to see space again.
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| Greg
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... Sure. Why not? How hurt could we get?
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| [Trans. Ext. the Barn]
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| (Greg brings Steven to a barn full with various junk.)
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| Greg
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My aunt and uncle had a great love for aviation and each other. They cherished the years they spent together, and they held on to every belonging they ever owned, kind of like me and my storage shed. I'm starting to think our family has a problem.
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| Steven
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This is great! I hereby declare this barn to be Universe & Universe's Universal Space Travel HQ!
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| (Steven and Greg begin to draw on a chalkboard and begin to build a spaceship using wood and duct tape. Steven then bring Pearl, covering her eyes, to the barn as a surprise.)
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| Steven
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Okay, now. *lifts his hands off Pearl's eyes*
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| Pearl
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*reads a sign on the barn* "UUU Space Travel"? What is this?
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| Steven
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We built a spaceship!
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| Pearl
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A spaceship?
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| Steven
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A spaceship! *gestures to a wooden box on wheels, with wings taped on the side*
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| Pearl
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*raises an eyebrow* A spaceship.
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| (Steven gets in the "spaceship", as he prepares to pilot it down the hill by the barn.)
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| Greg
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Now, remember, Steven, if you run into any trouble out there, you can always bail. There's never any shame in bailing.
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| Steven
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Fatherly advice understood! Thank you, Dad. Light the engines.
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| Greg
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Roger that! *lights a sparkler and places it at the back of the "spaceship"*
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| Steven
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Next stop: Outer space!
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| Greg
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Blast-off!
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| (Greg pushes the "spaceship" with his legs and Steven rides down the hill. He begins riding towards a ramp at the bottom of the hill, when the "spaceship" starts falling apart.)
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| Pearl
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*panics* Aah!
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| Steven
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No shame! *jumps out of the "spaceship"*
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| (The "spaceship" rams into the ramp and breaks into pieces.)
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| Pearl
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I think your calculations may have been off.
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| Greg
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Well, they can't be off if you don't do any.
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| [Trans. Ext. the Barn]
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| Pearl
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*points at Steven's drawing on the chalkboard* Did you really think this was gonna work?
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| Steven & Greg
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*shrugs* Mnh-mnh-mnh.
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| Pearl
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Here, look. *flips the other side of the chalkboard and starts drawing* You need smooth, curving surfaces. Otherwise, you're never gonna get enough speed to break Earth's gravitational pull. Probably swept-back wings for supersonic flight, airtight cockpit with ejector seat, and we'll need some serious engines, or maybe rockets would be better.
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| Steven
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I vote rockets!
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| Greg
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Whoa, whoa. Hold on a sec. We're not actually talking about building something like this, right?
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| Pearl
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What? This?! *reveals a detailed diagram of an actual spaceship on the chalkboard* Of course not. That would be ridiculous. I mean, yes, theoretically, it's not a stretch. You've got plenty of spare parts here, albeit for incredibly primitive propulsion-based space travel. The idea is ludicrous. It would never work, although... Several humans, a monkey, and a dog did make it into space. I don't know why I've never even thought of it before. This could actually work!
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| Steven & Greg
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Uh...
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| Pearl
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I hear what you're saying, and I agree— it would be incredibly dangerous; a fool's errand.
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| (Pearl pulls a lob of stuffing out of Greg's love seat.)
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| Pearl
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This chair is disgusting. But aren't the true fools the ones who don't seize an opportunity, despite all the inherent risks? *hands Greg the lob of stuffing* And I'd be able to show Steven the wonders of the cosmos! And maybe just for a second, from a distance, I could see what's been going on without me. (Steven gazes excitedly at Pearl.) All right! Let's do it!
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| Steven
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UUU Space Travel, GOOOOO!
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| (Steven and Greg begin helping Pearl to construct the spaceship with various spare parts from the barn. They even constructed a small seated glider for Steven to ride in.)
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| Steven
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*piloting the glider* Waaa-hooooo!
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| Greg
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*using a walkie-talkie* Ground Control to Mach 2. Come in, Mach 2. How you doing, buddy?
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| Steven
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Aah! Aah-aah-aah-aah! Woow! *muttering in the winds*
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| Greg
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You think we're taking this a little far?
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| Pearl
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We're not even close to being done.
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| Greg
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We're not?
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| Pearl
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Okay, Steven. Go ahead and bring her down.
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| (Steven lands the Mach 2 smoothly on the ground, and it collapses immediately, ejecting Steven out of the seat.)
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| Steven
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Ugh! Wooo!
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| Greg
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Was it supposed to fall apart like that?
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| Pearl
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Don't worry. This was just to test my engine concept. I'll work out the kinks in the next one.
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| Greg
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Hang on, hang on. Next one?
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| Pearl
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Is there a shop in town that carries F-1 single-nozzle liquid-fueled rockets?
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| Greg
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*startled and shocked* You really are serious!
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| Pearl
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Of course! We're also going to need a spacesuit for Steven so he doesn't freeze or explode.
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| Steven
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*imitates an explosion*
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| Greg
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*irritated* Whoa! You are not taking him to space.
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| Pearl
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Yes, I am.
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| Greg
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No! I'm not allowing it!
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| Steven
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But why? This is why we founded Universe & Universe.
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| Greg
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Steven, you're grounded.
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| Steven
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What?!
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| Greg
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No, no. I mean you're grounded! You don't get to leave Earth.
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| Steven
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Oh... What?!
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| Greg
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As C.E.O. and Supreme Space Commander, I hereby ground this astronaut and cancel this mission.
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| Steven
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Aw, man! Stupid company by-laws.
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| Pearl
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Hey! Who made you C.E.O.?
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| Greg
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*tilts head towards Steven* He did.
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| Pearl
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Fine! If neither of you will help, I'll just do it by myself! Not like it'll be much different. *storms off into the barn and shuts the door*
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| Steven
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Pearl!
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| Greg
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I'm sorry, bud. Sometimes you just got to know when to bail.
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| [Time Skip — Night time]
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| (Greg is fast asleep in his van, parked next to the barn. Steven sleeps on top of the van in his caterpillar sleeping bag, when Pearl comes in and pokes him in the face.)
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| Steven
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M-mm... Wha?
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| Pearl
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Shh! *whispering* Want to see something really cool?
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| Greg
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*snoring and sleep-talking* No. Don't give him the banana. That's what he wants.
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| (Pearl and Steven sneak past Greg and towards the barn. Pearl opens the barn door to reveal a completed spaceship.)
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| Pearl
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Presenting the brand-new ballistic-flight-capable Universe Mach 3!
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| Steven
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*gasps and shouts* Spaceship! *runs to the spaceship, laughing happily*
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| Pearl
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Wait, Steven. Keep your voice down.
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| Steven
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*grunts* *laughs* Whoa! It's even got the logo from the van!
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| Pearl
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And if your dad asks, we'll say we borrowed it.
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| Steven
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*climbs into the cockpit of Mach 3* Whoa. Look at all the buttons! I must press them all.
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| Pearl
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If you want, Steven, we could take her out for an engine check. *changes her outfit into a space suit* It'll be quick.
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| (The place begins to rumble, waking Greg up.
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| Greg
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Wha?! What the...? *notices his van has been tampered with* Pearl! *runs up and sees Steven and Pearl piloting the Mach 3 away* Steven, what are you doing?!
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| (Greg chases after the Mach 3, when the rockets fire up, creating a blast that knocks Greg back. Greg quickly gets up and runs towards the barn. Pearl begins to gliding the Mach 3 over the ocean.)
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| Steven
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*laughs* Wow! Look! You can see the temple!
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| Pearl
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*adjusts the ship controls* Mm-hmm.
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| Greg
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*over the radio transmission* Hey, can you hear me!? Where do you two think you're going!?
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| Steven
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Hey, Dad, guess where I am.
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| Greg
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*using a walkie-talkie* I know where you are! It's where you're going that concerns me!
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| Steven
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Don't worry, Dad. This is just a quick test flight.
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| Pearl
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This will be perfectly fine, just a pop over to the nearest star system. I'll give him back in 50 years.
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| Steven
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50 years?
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| Greg
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What?! I'll be dead in 50 years! Pearl, you bring him back right now, or I'll -- (Pearl turns off her end of the transmission.) Hello? Hello?!
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| Steven
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Pearl, I'm not supposed to go. Pearl!
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| Pearl
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Oh, this is so exciting! Steven, you're gonna love it. *plays a keyboard panel, activating the boosters* Hang on tight!
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| (The Mach 3 darts across the ocean and then upwards into the sky. Pearl and Steven pilot all the way to the atmosphere of the Earth, when Steven see a piece of scrap metal flies by.)
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| Steven
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What was that?
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| (The warning lights in the cockpit begin to flash on. More scrap metal pieces are seen falling off the Mach 3 as it penetrates the atmosphere.)
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| Steven
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Pearl!?
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| Pearl
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We can make it. We're almost there.
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| (The Mach 3 begins to fall apart with visible tears in its shell.)
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| Steven
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Pearl!
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| Pearl
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I'm gonna show it to you.
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| (Steven looks around in panic and see a release mechanism. He pulls on it and it releases the glass hatch covering the cockpit, exposing him and Pearl to the atmosphere.)
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| Pearl
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Steven! What are you doing?!
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| Steven
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We need to go, Pearl! We're not gonna make it!
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| Pearl
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But we're almost there!
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| Steven
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Pearl! I know you miss space, and I know you worked hard, but sometimes... You just got to know when to bail.
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| (Pearl sheds a tear as she gazes up to space. She then pulls a lever on the side of the chair she is sitting on and hugs Steven tightly. The chair ejects both of them out of the spaceship just as it explodes.)
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| Greg
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Nooooo! *scans the sky with his binoculars* Please-please-please-please-please! *sees the ejected Pearl and Steven, floating back to Earth with a parachute* Ahhhh... *kneels on the ground* Ohhhhh... *holds his chest* Ohh, this kid's killing me... *lays down and cowers* Ughhhh...
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| Pearl
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*floating back to Earth with Steven* I'm so sorry. I almost got us killed.
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| Steven
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I'm used to it. I'm sorry I couldn't help you go to space. We'll get there someday— I promise.
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| Pearl
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You know, I think I'd rather be here on Earth.
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| Steven
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With me!
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| Pearl
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Yeah. With you.
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| (The star iris zooms in on the distant sunset, ending the episode.)
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| [END]
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