| Speaker
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Dialogue
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| [Open Ext. Beach House]
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| (It is raining, outside. Lion is lying outside under the porch of the house, he yawns and takes a nap.)
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| [Trans. Int. Steven's Room]
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| (Steven and the Crystal Gems are sitting inside Steven's bedroom and eating popcorn, watching Lonely Blade IV in Japanese with English subtitles. On the TV screen, two characters confront each other.)
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| Lonely Blade
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*in Japanese* It was you! You were the one who killed my brother. Cursing me to fight alone forever!
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| Steven
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*is laying belly-down on top of Garnet's hair* * Oh Lonely Blade, you so lonely.
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| Samurai President
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*in Japanese* You think you can defeat me? The President of the Shadow Samurai Government?! *unsheathes a hidden sword in his mop*
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| Steven
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What?! The janitor is the evil samurai president?! That's bananas!
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| Pearl
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Oh come on, it was so obvious. He's been mopping in the background of every fight scene. *shows Steven the movie cover box* Look, here he is on the cover of the box.
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| Steven
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Oh yeah.
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| Lonely Blade
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*in Japanese* For my honor and for my brother! I will strike you down! *unsheathes and joins two swords together* Boomerang Blade! *throws the combined swords*
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| Samurai President
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*leaps upwards and thrust down* Piercing Shadow of a Thousand... Screams!
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| Steven
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*cheers* Go, Lonely, go! Do the Boomerang Blade again!
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| Pearl
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Oh come on, this is ridiculous. Just look at their form, this is nothing like real sword fighting. (Garnet and Amethyst shushes her.)
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| Steven
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*laughs* It's just a movie, Pearl. *eats a handful of popcorn*
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| Pearl
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Well, if you ever want to see a demonstration of proper sword techniques, I'd be happy to show you. (Steven puts his hand on Pearl's head, staring excitedly.) Now?
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| [Trans. Pearl's Arena]
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| (The Crystal Gems move a large open area with tiled ground and marble obelisks lining both sides of the area. The place is surrounded by low hanging clouds.)
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| Pearl
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*holding two swords* Alright, in order to give a proper demonstration I'm going to need a sparring partner. (Steven tries to raise his hand and Garnet immediately lowers it.) Luckily, I have the perfect candidate right here. *does a short ballet and summons a Holo-Pearl with her gem*
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| Steven
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Cooool! Hologram Pearl!
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| Amethyst
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*lying on a small cloud* Ah, geez.
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| Holo-Pearl
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Do you wish to engage in combat?
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| Pearl
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Let this be the perfect battle. *throws a sword at Holo-Pearl*
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| Holo-Pearl
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*catches the sword* You've already made a mistake by challenging me!
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| Pearl
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*laughs* We shall let our swords decide.
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| Amethyst
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Nerd! (Garnet and Steven shush her.)
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| Holo-Pearl
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*eyes redden* Commencing duel. *lunges towards Pearl*
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| (Pearl parries several of the Holo-Pearl's attacks.)
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| Holo-Pearl
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Defense rank S. Zero openings detected.
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| Steven
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*cheers* Go, Pearl, go!
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| Amethyst
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Go Holo-Pearl!
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| (Distracted by Amethyst's mockery, Pearl gets disarmed by Holo-Pearl.)
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| Holo-Pearl
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Opening detected. *does a sword sweep attack*
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| (Pearl slides underneath Holo-Pearl's attack and towards her sword. Holo-Pearl then does an aerial lunge at Pearl, which she skillfully parries, leaving it vulnerable in mid-air. Pearl then stabs Holo-Pearl and defeats it.)
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| Holo-Pearl
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Match set. Challenger wins!
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| Steven
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Woohoo! Yay, Pearl! *runs towards Pearl*
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| Holo-Pearl
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Do you wish to battle again?
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| Steven
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Pearl! *runs around Pearl* That was amazing, you were so cool!
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| Pearl
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*blushes and chuckles* Oh-hoho, well, one does try their best.
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| Steven
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*excitedly* Will you teach me to sword fight like you?! *pretends to swing a sword*
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| Pearl
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*laughs* Alright, but we should start with the basics. *turns to Holo-Pearl* Ahem! Initiate, training mode.
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| Holo-Pearl
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*gets up* Training mode initiated. Level 1. Begin! *takes a stance*
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| Pearl
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I want you to stand back Steven, and watch me carefully, okay?
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| Holo-Pearl
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*begins sparring with Pearl* Parry! Parry! Thrust! Parry! Parry! Thrust! *continuously chants in the background*
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| Pearl
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Do you see what I'm doing with my feet, Steven? Notice where I keep my center of gravity.
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| Steven
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*quickly loses interest* Aww, can you show me something cool? Like the Boomerang Blade!
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| Pearl
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Steven, you know that's not a real sword technique.
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| Steven
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*chanting* Boomerang Blade! Boomerang Blade! Boomerang Blade!
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| Pearl
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*turns to Steven, annoyed* Steven, these are real sword techniques. Not those silly things from your movies. It's about waiting carefully for the perfect moment to str-
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| (Distracted, Pearl is suddenly stabbed by Holo-Pearl "thrust".)
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| Steven
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*gasps*
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| Amethyst
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Woah.
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| Garnet
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Oh no.
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| (Pearl drops her sword, which hits the ground with a loud clang.)
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| Steven
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*tears up* ...Pearl?
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| Pearl
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*sees the sword impaled through her and chuckles nervously* W-whoopsie-daisy! Steven, it's okay. I'm gonna be just f-
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| (Pearl suddenly poofs into a white cloud, leaving just her gemstone, as it falls to the ground.
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| Steven
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NOOOOOO! *slides to Pearl's gemstone and picks it up* P-Pearl? Pearl...
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| Holo-Pearl
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Challenger defeated. Level 1 failed!
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| Garnet & Amethyst
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Steven! *rush to Steven's side*
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| Steven
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*crying* I.... I-I was just... a-aand she was trying to-
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| Amethyst
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*puts her hand on his back* Steven, it's okay, Pearl's gonna be just fine.
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| Steven
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*turns to Garnet* Whaddya mean?
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| Garnet
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Sometimes, if our bodies are badly damaged, we release our physical forms and retreat to our gems to regenerate.
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| Steven
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So she's gonna be okay? (Garnet nods.)
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| Amethyst
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*sits down* Don't worry, bud. These kinds of things just happen sometimes. Usually to me.
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| Garnet
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Always to you.
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| Amethyst
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Hey, I'm scrappy. Whaddya want?
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| Steven
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*laughs* So, how long will it take her to regenerate? 5 minutes? 10 minutes? (Garnet and Amethyst frown.)
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| [Time Skip — Two weeks later]
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| [Trans. Int. Beach House]
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| (Steven places Pearl's gem in a hand basket and places it under a lamp, hoping to incubate it.)
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| Steven
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*sighs* What's taking so long?
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| (Garnet and Amethyst warp in on the Warp Pad. Amethyst is still riding atop the small cloud.)
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| Amethyst
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Whadup?
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| Steven
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*depressed* Heeey.
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| Amethyst
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*floats over* She's still not done? Man, she's really taking her time with this one. Gotta tell you though, love what you've done with the place.
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| (Steven and Amethyst observe the messy state of the house, with trash everywhere, things lying carelessly on the ground, and dishes piled up in the kitchen. Garnet returns back to her room in the background.)
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| Steven
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Pearl usually helps me tidy up.
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| Amethyst
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Eh, I say leave it.
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| Steven
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Hey! If real Pearl can't be here, there's always the next best thing!
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| (Steven runs to unravels a blanket hiding a figure in the corner of the room, revealing it to be Holo-Pearl, holding a sword.
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| Holo-Pearl
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Do you wish to engage in combat?
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| Amethyst
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Steven. *sighs* Cover that thing back up.
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| Steven
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But it's like Pearl. Look at it.
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| Amethyst
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Yeahhh... That ain't Pearl.
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| Steven
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Well, maybe I can get it to act like her.
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| [Trans. Steven's Room]
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| (Steven shows Holo-Pearl his room, which is as messy as the rest of the house.)
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| Steven
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Here we have, a mess. Organizing messes is one of Pearl's favorite hobbies. Here. *bends down and picks up various figurines* Pearl likes to organize them by type. Animal, humanoid, miscellaneous. Now you try. *picks up a figurine with a sword prop*
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| Holo-Pearl
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*switches to combat mode* You've drawn your sword in vain!
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| Steven
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What?! Aah!
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| (Holo-Pearl thrusts forwards, which Steven quickly ducks under, and stabs the toy Steven was holding.)
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| Holo-Pearl
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Challenger defeated. *switches to stand-by mode*
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| Steven
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*sighs* Maybe we need to try something else.
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| [Trans. Ext. Beach House]
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| (Garnet and Amethyst are standing on the beach, as Steven and Holo-Pearl watch from a distance. Amethyst holds the cloud, all clumped up in her hands.)
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| Amethyst
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I'm gonna do it.
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| Garnet
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Go on then.
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| (Amethyst stuffs the cloud into her mouth and swallows it, causing her to inflate like a balloon and float upwards. Garnet grabs Amethyst's legs before she floats off.)
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| Steven
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*laughs* Pearl always likes to tease Amethyst when she does funny stuff like this.
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| Holo-Pearl
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*holding an umbrella* I won't go easy on you this time!
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| Steven
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That's the spirit! *walks over to Garnet and Amethyst* What are you rascals doing over here?
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| Holo-Pearl
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Draw your weapon, challenger! *points the umbrella like a sword and opens it*
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| Amethyst
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Ugh, Steven, why are you still hanging out with that thing? It's gross. *burps out a piece of cloud*
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| Steven
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I just really miss spending time with Pearl.
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| Garnet
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Pearl will come back to us in time, Steven, have patience. ... And stop hanging out with that thing. It's creepy.
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| (Garnet crosses her arms, accidentally letting go of Amethyst. Amethyst then quickly floats into the sky.
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| Amethyst
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Wh-o-o-o-oa!
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| Garnet
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Hmm...
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| [Trans. Pearl's Tree]
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| (Holo-Pearl and Steven stand atop the hill with Pearl's tree, Steven is holding a stuffed walrus toy and Holo-Pearl is holding a balloon sword, wearing a balloon crown.)
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| Steven
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You had fun at the boardwalk, right?
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| Holo-Pearl
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Parry!
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| Steven
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Oh come on, you gotta work with me here. This is Pearl's favorite tree. Don't you recognize it? What's on your mind? Come on, don't hold back.
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| Holo-Pearl
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*switches to combat mode* Challenge accepted!
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| Steven
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What?!
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| (Holo-Pearl quickly swings the balloon sword, which Steven ducks under, and slices the tree clean in half .)
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| Steven
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Oh no, the tree!
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| Holo-Pearl
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Challenger defeated. *switches back to stand-by mode*
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| Steven
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Real Pearl would never do that! Grr, you're hopeless! Get away from me! *runs off*
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| [Trans. Int. Beach House]
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| (Rain and lighting belt down once more. Steven watches the downpour through the window while talking to Pearl's gem, nestled in a blanket beside him.)
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| Steven
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It's too bad you're still not back, Pearl. *holds up a movie cover box* Because I just found a copy of the fifth Lonely Blade movie! ... *sighs* How long are you gonna make me wait, Pearl? (A beeping sound go off in the background.) Oh, the popcorn's done, stay right there.
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| (Steven goes to the kitchen and takes out a bag of popcorn from the microwave. Holo-Pearl suddenly appears behind him, shocking Steven.)
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| Holo-Pearl
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Do you wish to test your skills against me in a duel?
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| Steven
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No! No sword fighting!
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| (Steven makes his way up to his bedroom, when lightning flashes, and Holo-Pearl appears behind him again.)
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| Holo-Pearl
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Draw your sword and fulfill your destiny!
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| Steven
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No! Leave real Pearl and me alone! *tosses a blanket over Holo-Pearl* Go back under your sheet.
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| (Steven watches the fifth movie of Lonely Blade with Pearl's gem, this time dubbed in English.)
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| Lonely Blade
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Brother, is that you?
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| Lonely Blade's Brother
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*as a zombie* Yes. It's me. Your... brother. Your technique is... *audio plays on in the background*
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| Steven
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Woah, this dub is really good. What do you think, Pearl?
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| Holo-Pearl
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*appears suddenly, still under the blanket, pierces through it with her sword* Parry!
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| Steven
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*startled* Gah! Grr... *continues to watch the movie*
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| Lonely Blade's Brother
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Brother!!
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| Lonely Blade
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Just wait a minute... you're not my real brother! Grr, Boomerang Blade! *unsheathes his swords*
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| Lonely Blade's Brother
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Your technique is impressive. But it won't be enough.
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| (Steven begins to think back at the moment Pearl was struck down.)
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| [Flashback]
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| Pearl
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It's about waiting carefully for the perfect moment to str-
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| [End Flashback]
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| (Steven eyes are shut tightly with tears forming, when Holo-Pearl suddenly attacks the TV.)
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| Holo-Pearl
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Thrust!
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| Steven
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Ah, the TV! Why must you destroy the things I love?
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| Holo-Pearl
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Challenger defeated. Continue?
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| Steven
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I hate you, I HATE YOU! You're nothing like Pearl! Pearl is smart, and she always wants to protect me from danger. All you want to do is FIGHT ME!
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| Holo-Pearl
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Challenge accepted!
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| Steven
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Grr, alright fine! *shoves Holo-Pearl*
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| Holo-Pearl
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Basic attack mode, initiated. *starts sparring* Parry! Parry! Thrust! Parry! Parry! Thrust! Parry! Parry! Thrust!
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| Steven
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Stop saying that! *picks up nearby toys and throws them at Holo-Pearl, landing a single hit*
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| Holo-Pearl
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Basic attack mode defeated. Now initiating advanced mode! *eyes redden*
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| (Holo-Pearl quickly shreds the blanket over it and attacks Steven, forcing him to retreat.)
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| Steven
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*picks up the toy walrus* Walrus shield! (The walrus toy gets decapitated. by Holo-Pearl.) Ah! *searches for another item* Snacks, pillow, fuzzy flower, boomerang? ...Boomerang! *throws the boomerang, which promptly flies around Holo-Pearl and back to his hand* Ah!
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| (Steven retreats into the kitchen while dodging Holo-Pearl's attacks. He grabs and wields a nearby mop. Holo-Pearl quickly chops the mop short and unleashes a flurry of attacks at Steven.)
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| Steven
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*dodging the attacks* Pearl! I should have just ... waited for you to come back. I should've waited for- (Holo-Pearl raises its sword above its head, revealing an opening.) The perfect moment! Boomerang Blade! (Steven launches the mop at Holo-Pearl, striking it in the torso, and finally defeating it.)
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| Holo-Pearl
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Challenger wins. Do you wish to duel again?
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| Steven
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NOOOO!
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| (Steven grabs the mop stuck in Holo-Pearl and begins swatting it away, dissolving its form. Garnet and Amethyst, still inflated, enter from outside.)
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| Garnet
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Steven, we heard fighting. *pulls Amethyst in like a balloon*
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| Amethyst
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Ow. Are you alright? What's going on?
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| Steven
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Oh, just moppin'. (The hologram begins to regenerate, and Steven swats at it.) DIE! You know, I might miss Pearl a whole lot, but, sometimes you just have to accept things the way they are before you-
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| (Just then, Pearl's gem begin to glow inside Steven's bedroom. It hovers into the air as Pearl begins to regenerate, sporting a slightly different outfit from before.)
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| Steven
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Never mind! Pearl's back!
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| Pearl
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Ah... That's much better. (Steven runs over to hug her.) Oof, hey, miss me much?
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| Steven
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Ah man, I had this whole thing planned out for when you came back! *runs off*
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| Pearl
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*notices the messy state of the house* Uh, Steven. What happened to your room? *sees the inflated Amethyst* I don't even want to know what happened to you.
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| Amethyst
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I got hit by an airplane!
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| (Steven returns, with his shirt tied around his head, using a pot and a wooden spoon like a drum.)
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| Steven
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*chanting* Pearl's back! Pearl's back! Pearl's back!
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| Pearl
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Steven, what are you doing?
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| (Steven continues to chant as Amethyst burps out more of the cloud. The star iris starts to zoom in on Pearl's face.)
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| Pearl
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Ughh... I can't leave you guys alone for a second.
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| Steven
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*pops in* Pearl's back!
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| [END]
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