The Good Lars/Transcript

This is a transcribed copy of "The Good Lars". Feel free to edit or add to this page, as long as the information comes directly from the episode.

Previous: "Doug Out"

Next: "Are You My Dad?"

Speaker	Dialogue
[Open Int. The Big Donut]
(Sadie presents a plate of an orange pumpkin-shaped bread to Steven on the counter. He cuts a small slice from the bread and eats it, while Lars glances away nearby.)
Sadie	So, how is it?
Lars	Be honest, but not too honest.
Steven	It's pumpkin bread! And it's pumpkin-shaped, like a pumpkin! This is the best idea anybody has ever had!
Sadie	See? I told you. It's really good.
Lars	Of course Steven likes it. He likes everything.
Steven	Lars, did you make this?
Lars	No! Well, yes, but it's no big deal.
Sadie	Secret's out, Lars. Feels good, doesn't it?
Lars	*blushes* Ah, stop.
Steven	Oh, this is amazing! How'd you get it to look like a pumpkin?
Lars	I just made seven small crescent-shaped cakes and used cream cheese icing to hold them together. Anyone with two hands and half a brain could do it. And, you know, a recipe.
Sadie	That's his way of saying thanks.
Steven	I know. I speak Lars.
(Just then, the doorbell chimes and Buck Dewey walks in.)
Lars	B-B-B-Buck Dewey!
(Panicking, Lars quickly hides his pumpkin bread behind the counter and leans onto the counter, sweating and smiling anxiously.)
Steven	Hi, Buck.
Buck	Hey, Steven. Hey, donut kids.
Lars	*hastily* Hi, Buck, what's up?! How's it going!? What'll it be?!
Buck	I want to order... you to come to dinner. Me, Jenny, and Sour Cream are having a potluck. You know, like parents do. Except we'll be doing it. All three of you should come. You should bring some food, because that's what you do at a potluck. It's so funny.
Lars	*laughs anxiously* That is funny, Buck! It sounds great! *make thumbs-ups* Super cool! Can't wait! *makes gun hands* Bingo, bongo!
Buck	Cool. *leaves the shop*
Lars	*puts face in his hands and groans loudly* "Bingo, bongo"!? Where did I even learn that?
Steven	Yeah! *imitates Lars* Bingo, bongo! This is gonna be great.
Sadie	Hey, yeah, this is perfect. You won't believe us when we say we like your cooking, but you'll have to believe it when it's coming from Buck.
(Lars groans and plants his face onto the counter.)
Sadie	Uh, Lars?
Lars	I'm not going.
Sadie	What?! You just got invited to a party with the Cool Kids! Isn't that what you've always wanted? If anyone shouldn't go, it's me. But they know you; they like you!
Lars	Nah-ah. Nobody knows me. And nobody knows I can bake.
Sadie	Well, I do, and he does.
Steven	Yeah, Lars, you should make this your big debut.
Lars	Well... then, it has to be perfect.
[Trans. Int. Lars' house]
(Lars paces around his room contemplating, while Steven lays on his bed and Sadie sits on a chair.)
Steven	How about a pie?
Lars	No.
Sadie	Uh, baked Alaska?
Lars	Mmm... It might look like I'm trying too hard.
Lars, Steven & Sadie	Hmm... *ponders*
Lars	Yeah, something cream-filled. A bundt? A cannoli? Maybe some rugelach? *puts his hands in his face* Gah! I don't know!
Sadie	Maybe we could make a cake with your face on it.
Steven	That's a great idea! You should make something that represents you.
(Lars gazes at himself in the mirror. He then lifts up the edge of his bed and pulls out a cookbook.)
Steven	*gasps* Secret cookbook.
Lars	Maybe this'll work. *sits on his bed and opens up his cookbook* I used to eat this as a kid all the time.
Steven	Wow. What's... uby?
Lars	It's ube.
Sadie	What's that?
Lars	*blushes* Uh, like, you know, it's like a sweet potato.
Steven	Potatoes can be sweet?
Lars	I mean, it's technically a yam.
Steven	Yams?!
Sadie	This sounds perfect!
(Lars goes downstairs and peeks from the staircase. Once he sees his parents are not around, he signals Sadie and Steven follow him downstairs. A montage begins as Lars explains the recipe procedures to Sadie and Steven. The trio gathers various ingredients such as flour, eggs, milk, and ube, and they begin to bake.)
(Lars separates an egg yolk from the egg white using the egg shells. Steven attempts the procedure but accidentally drops the egg. Sadie uses a mixer to mix the ingredients together, but accidentally sends some of the paste flying everywhere. Steven then attempts to pour the ube mix out of its bag and into the paste, accidentally splashing some of the paste out of the bowl too.)
(Lars takes over the rest of the procedures: mixing the ube with the paste, laying wax paper into a pan, pouring the ube mix onto it and baking it. Once the ube cake is baked, Lars spreads cream onto it and rolls it up. He finally tops the cake with three dollops of cream and present the cake on a plate on the table in front of Sadie and Steven.)
Lars	It's done. *wipes sweat off his forehead*
(Steven and Sadie look at each other before taking a small piece from the ube cake and eating it.)
Lars	So, how is it?
Steven	It's...
Steven & Sadie	Amazing!
Sadie	This is delicious.
Steven	You're an amazing baker, Lars.
Lars	Well, yeah, of course I am.
(Lars looks down and finds that Steven and Sadie have almost instantaneously devoured the whole ube cake.)
Steven	Sorry, Lars. It's really good.
Lars	Guess I have to take your word for it.
[Time-Skip, Evening]
Sadie	I'm gonna head out and get my stuff for the party. This is it! It's all happening! Lars and the Cool Kids! See ya there!
(Sadie leaves Lars' house, as he places another baked ube cake on the table.)
Steven	Bye, Sadie. *sighs* Everything is so good.
Lars	Yeah, too good. *begins spreading cream on the ube cake*
Steven	What do you mean?
Lars	*blushes* Uhh... Never mind.
Steven	Aw, come on. You can tell me anything. I spent a day in your body.
Lars	It's nothing. Forget about it.
(Lars continues to spread cream on the ube cake in silence, when Steven reaches out and places his hand on Lars' shoulder.)
Steven	*whispers* Open up about your feelings.
Lars	*sighs* I'm not worried about the cake. The cake is gonna rule. I'm worried about showing up with a cake.
Steven	What do you mean?
Lars	There's a reason I don't like telling anybody I like baking.
Steven	And... What's that?
Lars	Because... It's lame, Steven! If I show up to this party with my family's weird purple cake and with Sadie, everybody's gonna know I love baking and everybody's gonna know I love... *blushes* This isn't gonna be an ironic potluck! It's gonna be, like, family, couple, neighbor, actual potluck, and I'm gonna be there being all... "bingo, bongo".
Steven	These are your friends. They want you to come. That's why they invited you, so they'll get to know you better. If they like you, they like you. If they don't, then it's their loss. Right?
Lars	*lays his head onto the table* That's pretty smart. When did you get so mature?
Steven	Somewhere in between learning to summon my shield and finding out my mom is a war criminal.
Lars	*slams the table and stands up in determination* Okay! I'll do it.
Steven	Lars! It's going to go so good! I got to get going and make my thing, but I'll see you there, right?
Lars	Yeah. Yeah! I'll see you.
[Trans. Ext. Sour Cream's House, Evening]
(Steven is waiting outside of Sour Cream's house, as the front door is shortly opened by Sour Cream.)
Sour Cream	Hey, man.
Steven	Who's feeling lucky?! *holds up a plate of sushi*
(Steven enters into the living room and places his plate of sushi on the table, next to the other food items.)
Steven	My, my. What a feast.
Sour Cream	*sits on the couch* I brought the soda.
Jenny	*sits on the couch too* I brought the pizza.
Buck	*sits on the couch three* I brought the assorted fruit.
Steven	I can't wait for Lars to get here. He made a- Wait, wait, I shouldn't tell you. It's a surprise.
Buck	That Lars is full of surprises. The other day, he did this thing. What was it? *makes gun hands* Bingo, bongo. It was transcendent.
Jenny	That is so creative.
Sour Cream	*makes gun hands too* Bingo, bongo.
(Just then, the doorbell rings.)
Steven	That's him! *runs and opens the door, only to find Sadie* Oh, Sadie. Where's Lars?
Sadie	He's not here yet?
Steven	He's probably still working on the cake. This is his ube debut, after all. *chuckles* Why don't you come on in?
Sadie	Oh, uh...
(Steven and Sadie walk into the living room, where the cool kids are chatting and laughing among themselves.)
Jenny	I love me some cheese.
Buck	You and your fancy cheese plates.
Jenny	*notices Sadie* Oh, hey, it's donut girl.
Steven	Everybody, this is Sadie.
Sadie	Uh, hi. I'm Lars'... friend.
Jenny	What's up? I'm Jenny.
Buck	Hey again.
Sour Cream	I'm Sour Cream. Welcome to my house!
Buck	So, tell us, Sadie, what did you bring to our very cool potluck?
Sadie	Sorry, I didn't bring any food. Just these paper plates. It's just, uhh... They're for Lars' thing, and he's not even here. Actually, I probably should just show myself-
Sour Cream	Did you say plates? *turns off the lights and throws some glow sticks onto the floor* Hooray! *switches on the lights* Now I don't have to do the dishes.
Sadie	Wow, I never thought anyone could get excited over paper plates. I guess they are biodegradable. But I'm still worried about Lars.
Steven	I'll go find him, don't you worry about it. Hang out, have fun!
Sour Cream	You can sit on the bean bag. *holds up a bean bag*
Jenny	Yeah, that bean bag is sick. You got to try it.
Sadie	Oh, all right. *sits on the bean bag* What do you know? I fit.
(The cool kids and Sadie laugh together.)
Jenny	Told ya.
Steven	*exits the house* I'll be right back with Lars. *closes the door* Now, where could he be?
(Steven begins running all around town to look for Lars. He first goes to Lars' house and speaks with his parents, who also do not know where Lars is. He stops by the Big Donut which closed for the night, asks Peedee by the Beach Citywalk Fries, and asks Mr. Smiley at the Funland Arcade, all with no luck. He then leaps high up into the sky, above Beach City.)
Steven	*shouting* LLAAAAAAAARRRSS!! *lands back on the ground* Laaaars! If only there was some way to contact him, with my mind... Oh, wait, or with my phone! *calls Lars on his cellphone*
Lars (Voicemail)	"This is Lars. Leave a message." *beeps*
Steven	Laaaaars!- I-I mean, Lars, hi. This is Steven. Uhh... I was just wondering where you were. The potluck is going really great. Everyone's having a nice time, and we're all excited for you to come join the fun. *begins walking back to Sour Cream's house* Or maybe I just missed you and you're already back at the party... And that's the sound of you enjoying music with all our friends. Or...
(Steven checks the garbage bin outside of Sour Cream's house and sees Lars' ube cake inside.)
Steven	...Maybe you decided not to go inside. Th-That's okay, though. Guess I'll... see you later.
(Steven hangs out, sighs in dismay, and closes the garbage bin. He then heads back inside and finds the cool kids and Sadie singing and playing music together.
Buck	♪ Pizza potluck ♪ Potluck, potluck ♪
Sadie	♪ Potlu-u-uck ♪ Po-o-otlu-u-uck ♪ Po-ot-lu-u-u-u-uck ♪ Po-o-otluck ♪ Potluck ♪
Sour Cream	All right! *claps*
Jenny	Nice! Hey, nice ending.
Sour Cream	Yeah, whoo!
Buck	Yeah, Sadie. That was fresh. Oh, hey, it's Steven.
Sadie	Hey, Steven, we've been having such a blast over here. Did you find Lars?
Steven	Uh, yeah. He- he can't make it tonight. Something came up.
Sadie	Ah, bummer, huh? *sighs* Well, that's okay. Let's keep playing music.
Jenny	Yeah!
Sour Cream	Right on.
[Trans. Ext. Sour Cream's house, Night-time]
Cool Kids	Bye, guys. See ya. Bye, guys.
Sadie	Later, guys. *exits the house with Steven* So... He decided not to come, huh?
Steven	Actually...
(Steven shows Sadie the discarded ube cake inside the garbage bin.)
Sadie	Aw, geez. Lars.
Steven	Maybe we should've tried harder to get him to come?
Sadie	Guess so. *closes the garbage bin*
(Steven and Sadie begin walking home.)
Sadie	Ughh. He wants to be in with them so much. Huh, it's funny. I never thought I'd be the one hanging out with them. You know, they really are cool. Like, not like he thinks, but, like- like, they're actually cool people. How's he going to realize that if he doesn't give them a chance? I wish I could just force him to be happy. Oh, no. I sound like my mother. Maybe I should be trying to fix my life instead of his.
Steven	*somberly* Bingo, bongo...
(Steven and Sadie then stop at a crossroad.)
Sadie	Goodnight, Steven.
Steven	Goodnight, Sadie.
(Steven and Sadie go their separate ways from the crossroad. As Sadie continues walking home, a large shadow appears behind her. A smaller, winged shadow appears beside it, as eerie music plays.)
[END]