The Message/Transcript

This is a transcribed copy of The Message. Feel free to edit or add to this page, as long as the information comes directly from the episode.

Previous: "Story for Steven"

Next: "Political Power"

Speaker	Dialogue
[Open Int. The Beach]
(Greg plays his guitar.)
Steven	*cheers* That sounded great!
Greg	Oh thanks! I'm thinking about calling it "Water Witch".
Steven	Cool.
Greg	And check this out, I can add some vocal distortion too. *robotic machine voice* Steven, your dad's a robot now. And now that I'm a robot *distortion* things will be better and cooler. Please forgive me for being an amazing machine.
Steven	I can't stay mad at my robo dad. Where's all this awesome energy coming from?
Greg	Actually, I was inspired to make some new songs after the ocean got sucked up into space a while back. I even drew up some freaky album artwork.
(Greg shows Steven his drawing of his album cover.)
Steven	It looks like *puts finger on drawing* Lapis Lazuli.
Greg	*takes drawing back* Easy with the tender touches, don't want it to get all smudged. Here, plug this up and help your old man work out this witchy jam.
Steven	Yeah! Let's! Jam!
(Steven strums the electric guitar but it makes no sound.)
Steven	Uh? Where my jams at?
Greg	I don't think it's plugged in.
Steven	Ah ha!
(Steven plugs the electric guitar into a T.V.)
Steven	All right, here we go. Let's *strums guitar*... jam!
(The guitar still makes no sound.)
Steven	Uh... hmm. *strums it again* Jam!
(The guitar still makes no sound.)
Steven	Hm *strums it again*... Jam!
(He repeatedly tries to strum guitar but still no noise is heard from it.)
Greg	*points to the TV* Oh, sorry, that's just the T.V. See, you plugged into the video jack but were making audio here. Don't you know video killed the audio star?
Steven	*looks around, dazed and confused* I have no idea what you are talking about.
Greg	That's okay, you leave the details to me. When you're a one-man band you got to know how to do it all
Steven	What a lovely poem.
Greg	Ok, we need a catchy hook! Something like-
(Greg starts singing and playing guitar.)
Greg	Well she's a riptide queen and she's super mean!
Steven	Woah, hold the phone, now give the phone to me. Lapis was not mean, she was just trying to get home. How 'bout this instead?
(Steven starts singing Lapis Lazuli while playing guitar.)
Steven	She was trapped in a mirror and it couldn't be clearer
(Steven is still singing, a montage of Lapis Lazuli starts playing.)
Steven	Lapis Lazuli... you fled into the bottom of the sea... Lapis Lazuli... you were so mad but then you came around to me.
(Steven stops singing and the montage stops when a strange, loud noise startles him.)
Steven	*trying to talk over the noise* Uh, what the heck is that?!
Greg	It must be some kind of weird feedback!
(He unsuccessfully tries to stop the noise by changed his audio keyboard.)
Greg	Hm, it's not us, it must be coming from the temple!
Steven	Let's go check it out!
Greg	You go on ahead, this is a gem thing and I don't want to get in the way. Plus I get to eat the rest of this pizza.
Steven	Good thinking. I'll be back.
(Noise intensifies as Steven opens the door)
Steven	What's happening?!
Pearl	It's the Wailing Stone!
Amethyst	Make it stop!
Pearl	It just activated on its own!
Amethyst	It won't shut up!
(Amethyst whines and Garnet momentarily stops the noise, but it soon continues.)
Everyone	Uh... !
Pearl	Stand back! *bubbles Wailing Stone and the noise stops*
Pearl	Ha, it worked, now we can get back to...
(The bubble grows large and pops, the noise comes back.)
Everyone	Ah... !
(Steven sticks his arm through the hole and the noise stops, but open his mouth and the noise continues.)
(Garnet removes Steven, shoves a couch cushion through the hole and places the rest around the stone and sits Steven on top of it.)
Garnet	I don't understand, that thing has laid dormant since we found it.
Pearl	I haven't heard a Wailing Stone activate since we used them for the rebellion, and I've never heard it sound like that!
Garnet	Someone is trying to send us a message.
Pearl	But who? We've rounded up all the Wailing Stones on Earth, and we're not sending this message to ourselves. Unless... Amethyst?! Is this a prank?!
Amethyst	No way! I want it to stop! I don't like it!
Garnet	If it's not coming from Earth, then a Gem must be sending this message from space.
Steven	Is that what some Gems sound like?
Pearl	No, no, we should be hearing a voice. Maybe this signal is too advanced for the Wailing Stone to process. That would explain the distorted audio.
Steven	Audio... my daddy-o knows audio!
Amethyst	Uh... you mean Greg.
Steven	Yeah!
Pearl	I don't know...
Garnet	Don't whine, let's try it.
(Greg is searching through his van on the beach.)
Greg	I can't believe it! You need help with sound stuff? You've come to the right guy! Ah ha! The Lubitz Cardioid Condenser 680! It's got warm tone without too much top end.
Amethyst	Uh, plus it's got a big honking sponge thing.
Greg	I know, isn't it awesome!
(Greg removes the couch cushions from the stone, causing Steven and the Gems to cover their ears, and plugs in his device.)
Greg	Now I'm going to add some reverb and some low octave effects, I'm also adding some fuzz 'cause who couldn't use more fuzz? Now if I directly input the Wailing Stone and put it through a flanger we might get what you're looking for.
Pearl	Flangers aside do you really think a signal like this is compatible with your analog devices?
Steven	Don't worry dad. *distorts voice* It'll work!
Greg	Well, here goes nothing.
(Old noise intensifies even more)
Amethyst	This is even worse!
Greg	I'm sorry!
Steven	Dad you can do it, you're the audio daddy-o!
Greg	Yeah! *tries to configure noise*
Amethyst	Uh.
Steven	It sounds like music.
Greg	Yeah, that's real nice.
(Noise changes into a more musical tone)
Greg	Yes, yes. Woo hoo!
Pearl	But, it's not supposed to be music. It's supposed to be a message!
Greg	Okay, hold on I got this.
(Noise starts to change)
Greg	It's changing!
Steven	It almost sounds like a voice.
Greg	Almost got it!
(Engine shorts out and noise stops)
Greg	Oh great.
Pearl	What's happening, where's the signal?
Greg	Uh, looks like the van battery couldn't handle all this.
Pearl	I had a feeling this wouldn't work, there's just no way that Greg's equipment can interface with our ancient Gem technology.
Steven	Ah... come on Pearl, you can't be ready to give up yet.
Greg	Look, we just got to keep trying. Sure we don't have the latest and greatest Gem tech, but-
(Garnet remove device, noise starts, she then puts back the couch cushions and noise stops.)
Garnet	It's okay Greg, you tried. Back to the temple. We'll figure something else out. *jumps off screen*
Pearl	What a waste of time. *jumps off screen*
Amethyst	See you later... Gregory. *jumps off screen*
Steven	Ah, come on y'all! *tries to jump off screen but fails*
Greg	I really blew it, huh?
Steven	Ah, Dad.
(Greg starts singing "Wailing Stone" and playing guitar.)
Greg	I could have tamed you, I could have shown I could depose you from your loud throne, but in the end I wasn't good enough. I just showed the Gems I ain't got the stuff. Oh Wailing Stone, I tried so hard to fly but I was thrown. Oh Wailing Stone, I gotta tell the Gems 'cause they should know. Have a little, have a little, have a little faith in me, I just wanted to help. You know I have a little, have a little, have a little expertise, I know it's not much but I know if it could come in handy I'd want to be there. I think so highly of you, it just isn't fair that you have so little faith... *stops singing*
Greg	Eh, that's a B-side.
Steven	Dad, I hate seeing you like this, there's gotta be something else we can try.
Greg	Eh, I don't know Steven. I mean, sound and stuff like this, this stuff's my whole world, and if I can't figure this out then I don't know, maybe it isn't even sound.
Steven	Dad, if it isn't sound then what else could it be? Hm, hm. Wait, what? Dad!
Greg	I'm not that far away from you, buddy.
Steven	What if it's...
Greg	Some other thing I'm not good at?
(Steven points at his eyes.)
Greg	*struggling* Magic... eyeballs... Oh my days, it's video!
Steven	We have to tell the Gems! Video! *starts running to beach house*
Greg	Hey, slow down!
(Greg runs into the beach house and starts talking without facing the Gems.)
Greg	I just want to help, have some faith in-
Amethyst	We're over here.
Greg	I know my audio equipment seems like a pile of Earth junk to y'all but-
Garnet	Greg, it's okay.
Greg	No it's not, you guys don't give up on anything, except for me. Come on... it's not like I can make it any worse!
(The Gems, Steven, and Greg are back at Greg's van.)
Pearl	Okay, go for it Garnet.
(Garnet holds jumper cables and generates her own electrical current.)
Pearl	Okay Amethyst, try it now.
Amethyst	I've never started a car with a key before. *turns key and starts car* Ha, that's way easier!
Pearl	The battery is ready to go.
Steven	The Wailing Stone is ready.
Greg	Ready with the video cord, Steven?
Steven	Ready.
(Steven plugs the cord into the TV and a sound starts and video is fuzzy.)
Pearl	Is that it?
Greg	Just a second.
Steven	I hear something.
Greg	Come on!
(The video then becomes clearer to reveal Lapis.)
Lapis	Steven!
Steven	Lapis!
Greg	I did it!
Pearl	I can't believe my flipping eyes!
Garnet	Everyone, listen up!
Lapis	I hope you're able to hear this. There's a Gem looking for you, she even knew your name. I don't know how! I didn't tell her, I swear! She's on her way to Earth, and she's not alone. Steven, Homeworld is not the way it used to be. Everything here is so advanced! I can't even understand it. There's no way anything on Earth can stand up to it. Please, don't put up a fight, It'll only lead to devastation--
(Video cuts off)
Pearl	It's Peridot, she must be talking about Peridot.
Amethyst	She's coming for us!
Steven	Lapis, she sounds so unhappy...
(Pearl and Amethyst freak out in background.)
Amethyst	What are we going to do?!
Garnet	Woo, we did it.
Pearl	What?
Garnet	We got the message.
Amethyst	But--
Garnet	It's got!
(Garnet shakes Greg's hand.)
Garnet	Thank you Greg, we would not have received this message without your help.
(Greg starts to tear up.)
Greg	You... you're welcome.
Steven	My dad is... *auto tunes his voice to sound robotic* the best!
Greg	Oh my gosh, Steven's a robot! Help, I can't relate to my robot son!
Steven	*robotic voice* My mind is the internet, I know every continuity mistake ever made on television.
(Greg and Steven laugh, ending the episode.)
[Episode Ends]